Today was an unusual day in many respects. For starters, Mummy got up with me at 7 and gave me my first feed instead of Daddy, I think my constant wake-up-and-howl-at-the-moon-for-no-apparent-reason routine from 2am had left her with a 'what the hell' attitude in the end. She even took me out to Sainsbury's after my feed so Daddy could catch up, so he got to sleep in until 9, the lucky thing.
Once Daddy got up I had lots of time playing with him and my big sister. She has been very cuddly with me today, we have had lots of quality time singing silly songs and playing with my toys. Daddy says she has been a brilliant help today and has let him do lots of little jobs.
I have also been in my new bouncer as much as I am allowed to be today, spinning and dancing and generally grinning until the dribble hits the floor unnoticed. It rocks my world.
I have been cunningly waiting until mid-feed again to ambush Daddy with nappy-based detonations. It's so much fun lying in the crook of his arm and watching his expression change as I fire off and he starts wondering whether or not its escaped into my trousers.
It did at lunchtime (after Mummy went back to bed with a sore throat after yelling herself hoarse at hockey practice last night), hehehehe. I managed to get it on the Booties-She-Can't-Take-Off, which was very annoying for Daddy as he'd only just got them washed and dried after the last time. When will he realise that I just don't like doing the whole 'clothes' thing?
After lunch I had a little sleep because I wanted to get in on the act with Mummy, but just as Daddy was about to make himself lunch the old Daddy Dinners Radar went off and I woke myself up. I'm just too damn good...
I was in very vocal mood after my lunchtime Powernap, so I decided to discuss the likely outcome of the US Elections with Daddy and Amber. In Yell. I woke Mummy up when I did it, my bad.
Daddy says what he had to deal with during my lunchtime feed is the only kind of Change He Can Believe In.
After I woke Mummy up Daddy took me up so I could have a cuddle and apologise, while he made his lunch. But she stayed in bed with me and gave me some toys to play with, and it was just so warm and cosy in there with her that I went to sleep all over again and stayed down for over an hour while she snuggled me. This meant that Daddy and Amber could have cuddles and play computer games together, which is good as she is on holidays from Big Big School this week and we all want to make the most of it.
Of course for Mummy and Amber, making the most of it seems to mainly consist of making really really sticky and yummy chocolate cakes that Daddy can't have because they will upset his tummy, and then waving them under his nose and saying 'Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm' a lot. Daddy is making some really quite scary threats to try and make them stop, but they just keep on grinning and saying how yummy everything tastes.
When they brought in the saucepan with the chocolate sauce in it to show him he started muttering about that divorce thing again. I really must find out what that means.
After my 5 o'clock feed I had Bath Time. Bath Time is great stuff, I always manage to soak Daddy as much as possible. Last week I got him all wet and after he changed his trousers he sat down to change my nappy then realised he was sitting on the towel he had put down to catch all the water that got over the edge of my baby bath earlier. Poor Daddy.
This time I had all my Zoggs in the bath. I have three of them - Sven Penguin, Jacques le Shark and the Zogtopus. Tonight I really wanted to eat Jacques' Fin, which Daddy says is a delicacy in some countries. Aren't I all sophisticated with the international cuisine there?
After I had had a good splashabout, Daddy held me while Mummy washed my hair. This is not my favourite part of the whole bathing experience, and boy did I let them know how I felt about it. Still, I always have fun when Daddy lays me down for drying out afterwards. He wraps me in the towel and rubs me dry, then assumes his long-suffering expression as I throw myself onto my Tummy just as he is trying to put the Talc on it.
I always seem to end up with Daddy blowing talc out of my tummy button. I have a proper Innie, and it does tend to get filled up with the talc when I wont stay still. Which is every time really, now I come to think of it.
After my bath Mummy went off to the pub to see Dan, so it was just the three of us. I was enjoying a cuddle with my big sister so much that I fell asleep on her - right before my last feed. In my state of being 95% asleep, I could just make out Daddy explaining what a pain I am to get to sleep if I have a nap before that last feed, so Amber woke me up again. I was not impressed, and vented my lack of impressedness in the time honoured fashion.
One major Yell later, and it was time for Amber to go and shower, and for me to have my last feed. I scoffed it down whilst Daddy carried on talking to his friend from America, Daphne, on the puter. They discussed how cute Mummy and Amber and I am, and lots of that Pottylicks stuff that Daddy and Grandad talk about a lot.
In the end I was so shattered that after I had said goodnight to Amber and Daddy zipped me into my sleepsuit and laid me down in my cot I barely had time to dictate this in Gurgle. It's been a long and busy day, and I have to get my head down now so I can be fresh in the morning after waking Mummy and Daddy up every hour of the night.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Thursday 30 October 2008
Wednesday 29 October 2008
Lulu Of The Dance
This afternoon I have experienced true bliss for the first time. The door bouncer thingy we got from Clo-clo is just the bestest game ever. I floated like a spacebaby and spun around to check out the spinniness of the washing machine then spun back to see Mummy, Amber and Daddy. Then Mummy lowered it a bit so my little feet could touch the ground and instead of floating I started bouncing!
If I pointed my little toesies I could push myself back up and do funny little leapy movements like one of those people on the telly who dance about looking like they have something shoved where the poo comes from (as Daddy so elegantly puts it). Mummy pointed out to him that I am technically part-Irish as Mummy's biololological Mummy is from Ireland, so it must be in my blood. Daddy said that that kind of dancing is actually about as truly Irish as his left armpit. Maybe he has a four-leaf clover growing in there?
High Arc Trajectory
By way of a wake-up request I managed to throw my dummy out of the cot this morning and hit Mummy right on the head!
When I grow up I think I shall be like Daddy's friend Murray.
(Daddy's Note: The rest of Murray's site is most definitely neither safe for work nor for those of a Leftist disposition with any form of heart condition. Don't say I didn't warn you...)
When I grow up I think I shall be like Daddy's friend Murray.
(Daddy's Note: The rest of Murray's site is most definitely neither safe for work nor for those of a Leftist disposition with any form of heart condition. Don't say I didn't warn you...)
Tuesday 28 October 2008
The Quest For Peppa Pig
Today was a Big Day Out. Mummy and I said goodbye to Daddy and Amber after my mid-morning feed and we went over to Dan's to see Clo-clo.
Clo-clo is Dan's daughter. She is bigger than me, a whole year and a half old. She is very, very blonde and curly and is lots of fun. She did get a bit jealous when I showed off my new command of the English language by calling Dan 'daddy' fifteen times, but apart from that she was very friendly as always. She shares her toys with me and is very generous when I come to see her.
When we were at Dan's we watched Dora the Explorer together and we each had one of Mummy's knees to sit on and bounced and danced to the music. Then Chloe and I both had a cuddle with Dan and Chloe's cousin Charlie took lots of pictures of us.
Charlie is even bigger than Clo-clo, he is a whole three years old! Which thinking about it makes Mummy quite old, and Daddy positively ancient.
We went to some new shops that I had never been to before next, but it was a bit boring so I fell asleep for a while. After I woke up it was very weird, we were all just standing around doing nothing that I could see, and so were the other people near us.
Then something new and exciting happened. One of the great big cars which dont make the passengers wear seatbelts and which you have to pay money to ride in came along, and we all got on it! Well, this was all very new. There were lots of people and new things to look at, and I could even look out the window like I do in our little car.
We rode into a place called Pool in the great big car. I looked to see whether it would be very wet or not but apart from a bit of rain it was barely even damp, so it was a very silly name for it. When we got there we met up with Dan's niece Charlie, who is a Big Big Girl like Amber. By this time I was very hungry, so we sat on the in a place called the Dolphin Centre and Mummy fed me. Like Pool, the Dolphin Centre has a silly name because there wasn't a single dolphin to be seen splashing in the fountains. I was quite disappointed about that.
After my feed we went to look for a genuine celebrity - Peppa Pig was in town! Clo-clo really likes Peppa Pig, and Daddy has let me watch her on Milkshake a couple of times in the morning. But when we got to her Travel Pen (which must be like my Travel Cot but muddier) there were so many people queueing up to see her and have their photy's taken that Mummy and Dan gave it up and just held us up high so we could see her.
She was Big, and Pink. Yeah. That was it, bit of a letdown really, all things considered.
For everyone else's lunch we went to Burger King. Everything there looked really yummy, especially the leaflets and napkins, several of which I attempted to nosh down while everyone else ate the boring stuff like burgers and fries.
After lunch it was time to go and see Dan's sister Vicki, who has two tiny babies who were born at the same time a few weeks ago. Chelsea and Charlie are also her children, and they have another sister who is also an Amber like my big sister. Dan said it was only a ten minute walk from Pool, but Mummy says she could have killed him because it was over thirty minutes. She says he has no sense of time at all, but that seeing as he works in a shop where he can go an hour without a customer coming through the door that isn't surprising.
So anyway, over hill and over dale we went, and by the time we got there I was so hungry that I had got a big bubble of air in my empty tummy and gave Mummy a huge, window-rattling burp after my feed. I think it made Clo-clo jump.
After my feed I played lots with Charlie and sat in a very unusual juddery bouncer. I thought it was great, but it did make the photos Charlie took of me very blurry unfortunately. Considering he is only three he does seem to like taking lots and lots of pictures.
When we went back to Dan's afterwards I was very tired from all the excitement, but I soon felt better when I got to have a go in a another special bouncer. This one was even better than the vibrating one, it goes in a doorway and you can sit right up in it and bounce about! Dan has given it to me as Clo-clo is too big for it now, so if I play my cards right and actually sleep for more than forty minutes at a time Mummy and Daddy might let me have a go on it tomorrow.
This week Mummy and Daddy have been mostly exhausted.
It was getting late, so Mummy and I got in the car and drove home. I tried really hard to go to sleep but Mummy wouldn't let me because it was getting close to last feed, and if I have a Powernap right before that I am a nightmare to get to sleep. Least thats what Daddy tells me, anyway.
When we got home I got lots of cuddles with Daddy and my big sister. They had really really missed me and were very pleased I was home. They were also pleased that I had been so well-behaved today - did you notice that not once have I had to reluctantly admit to kicking off whilst we were out? I've just been that good.
Daddy says I am teh Angel.
Daddy and Amber were also really pleased that I said 'hiya' to Chelsea earlier, too. I am getting good at this Big People language, though I still prefer a learned, erudite discourse in Shriek really.
I was so happy with all the attention that I detonated a serious Size Seven in my nappy right before my last feed, and had to dictate the last of this post in Red-Faced Strain. Mummy said it actually felt like her sinuses were stinging. Daddy said not to be such a big wuss.
I am very very tired now, so I think I shall fall fast asleep with that final feed. Hopefully I will be as good overnight as I have been through the day and Mummy and Daddy can catch up on a bit of sleep.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Clo-clo is Dan's daughter. She is bigger than me, a whole year and a half old. She is very, very blonde and curly and is lots of fun. She did get a bit jealous when I showed off my new command of the English language by calling Dan 'daddy' fifteen times, but apart from that she was very friendly as always. She shares her toys with me and is very generous when I come to see her.
When we were at Dan's we watched Dora the Explorer together and we each had one of Mummy's knees to sit on and bounced and danced to the music. Then Chloe and I both had a cuddle with Dan and Chloe's cousin Charlie took lots of pictures of us.
Charlie is even bigger than Clo-clo, he is a whole three years old! Which thinking about it makes Mummy quite old, and Daddy positively ancient.
We went to some new shops that I had never been to before next, but it was a bit boring so I fell asleep for a while. After I woke up it was very weird, we were all just standing around doing nothing that I could see, and so were the other people near us.
Then something new and exciting happened. One of the great big cars which dont make the passengers wear seatbelts and which you have to pay money to ride in came along, and we all got on it! Well, this was all very new. There were lots of people and new things to look at, and I could even look out the window like I do in our little car.
We rode into a place called Pool in the great big car. I looked to see whether it would be very wet or not but apart from a bit of rain it was barely even damp, so it was a very silly name for it. When we got there we met up with Dan's niece Charlie, who is a Big Big Girl like Amber. By this time I was very hungry, so we sat on the in a place called the Dolphin Centre and Mummy fed me. Like Pool, the Dolphin Centre has a silly name because there wasn't a single dolphin to be seen splashing in the fountains. I was quite disappointed about that.
After my feed we went to look for a genuine celebrity - Peppa Pig was in town! Clo-clo really likes Peppa Pig, and Daddy has let me watch her on Milkshake a couple of times in the morning. But when we got to her Travel Pen (which must be like my Travel Cot but muddier) there were so many people queueing up to see her and have their photy's taken that Mummy and Dan gave it up and just held us up high so we could see her.
She was Big, and Pink. Yeah. That was it, bit of a letdown really, all things considered.
For everyone else's lunch we went to Burger King. Everything there looked really yummy, especially the leaflets and napkins, several of which I attempted to nosh down while everyone else ate the boring stuff like burgers and fries.
After lunch it was time to go and see Dan's sister Vicki, who has two tiny babies who were born at the same time a few weeks ago. Chelsea and Charlie are also her children, and they have another sister who is also an Amber like my big sister. Dan said it was only a ten minute walk from Pool, but Mummy says she could have killed him because it was over thirty minutes. She says he has no sense of time at all, but that seeing as he works in a shop where he can go an hour without a customer coming through the door that isn't surprising.
So anyway, over hill and over dale we went, and by the time we got there I was so hungry that I had got a big bubble of air in my empty tummy and gave Mummy a huge, window-rattling burp after my feed. I think it made Clo-clo jump.
After my feed I played lots with Charlie and sat in a very unusual juddery bouncer. I thought it was great, but it did make the photos Charlie took of me very blurry unfortunately. Considering he is only three he does seem to like taking lots and lots of pictures.
When we went back to Dan's afterwards I was very tired from all the excitement, but I soon felt better when I got to have a go in a another special bouncer. This one was even better than the vibrating one, it goes in a doorway and you can sit right up in it and bounce about! Dan has given it to me as Clo-clo is too big for it now, so if I play my cards right and actually sleep for more than forty minutes at a time Mummy and Daddy might let me have a go on it tomorrow.
This week Mummy and Daddy have been mostly exhausted.
It was getting late, so Mummy and I got in the car and drove home. I tried really hard to go to sleep but Mummy wouldn't let me because it was getting close to last feed, and if I have a Powernap right before that I am a nightmare to get to sleep. Least thats what Daddy tells me, anyway.
When we got home I got lots of cuddles with Daddy and my big sister. They had really really missed me and were very pleased I was home. They were also pleased that I had been so well-behaved today - did you notice that not once have I had to reluctantly admit to kicking off whilst we were out? I've just been that good.
Daddy says I am teh Angel.
Daddy and Amber were also really pleased that I said 'hiya' to Chelsea earlier, too. I am getting good at this Big People language, though I still prefer a learned, erudite discourse in Shriek really.
I was so happy with all the attention that I detonated a serious Size Seven in my nappy right before my last feed, and had to dictate the last of this post in Red-Faced Strain. Mummy said it actually felt like her sinuses were stinging. Daddy said not to be such a big wuss.
I am very very tired now, so I think I shall fall fast asleep with that final feed. Hopefully I will be as good overnight as I have been through the day and Mummy and Daddy can catch up on a bit of sleep.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Sunday 26 October 2008
The First Word
At 5 months and nineteen days old there was the Word. And the Word was 'Daddy'.
Grandad says we're on the slippery slope now, and no one will be able to shut me up until the 22nd century.
Grandad says we're on the slippery slope now, and no one will be able to shut me up until the 22nd century.
Saturday 25 October 2008
That Is Illogical, Mummy
We got two £75 discount vouchers from Comet in the post today. Mummy says this means when she has finished her Driving Instructor Training we can now pay £120 more for a new TV than we were going to before we got the vouchers.
Daddy says that's insane. Mummy says it's Female Logic and mustn't be questioned. What do you think?
In other news, we went to Christchurch today to help my big sister spend some of her birthday money. She bought some cool things and got herself a Raspberry Ripple Milkshake from the Chilly Wizard man. I was looking quite carefully, but he still didn't have a pointy hat or a staff so I call shenanigans on him being magical. I think he just makes really yummy ice cream.
Today I have been very mimpy indeed. My toothies are being a pain in the, erm, mouth. So I am spreading the pain around by doing most of my business in Shriek all say long. I even managed to give Daddy a headache by sheer volume earlier, that'll teach him not to pop those teeth for me when I want him to. I don't care how he does it, I'll take pliers or experimental dental surgery at this point.
I also managed to really get him good earlier by pooing nicely whilst he was in the middle of changing the first half of the poopy nappy. He shouldn't have been quite so quick to lay me down, should he? I mean you'd think he'd have figured out what a little wotsit I am with the nappy changes by now, and pooing in mid-change takes me to a whole new level of sheer, bloody-minded awkwardness. That's what Daddy says anyway, and as his dutiful little girl who am I to argue?
See the butter in my mouth? Not melting.
Mummy and Amber are going to do lots of baking in half-term. So they picked up a recipe book in Christchurch and we all went to Sainsbury's to pick up ingredients before my last feed. Mummy and Daddy had a playfight over who got to push me when we were in there. In the end Daddy jumped up on Mummy and she nearly had to give him a piggyback until we got home. At one point he grabbed the trolley and backed off, calling 'Toro, Toro!' and got a ding. I don't know what a Toro is, but I don't think Mummy appreciated being compared to one. Silly Daddy.
I didn't want to go to bed when we got back though. Mummy and Daddy ought to have figured out that if I manage to get a little 15 minute Powernap before my last feed I'm going to be impossible to get down straight away. And tonight I managed to drop off on the way back from Sainsbury's.
So in the end after much upset and Headflinging upstairs in the bedroom, Daddy took me out the back garden in my baby sleeping bag and my famous yellow blanky. He stood so the wind wouldn't get me very much and cuddled me and sang to me until I went to sleep. I must find his singing and the sound of the wind whistling through the trees very soothing indeed.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Daddy says that's insane. Mummy says it's Female Logic and mustn't be questioned. What do you think?
In other news, we went to Christchurch today to help my big sister spend some of her birthday money. She bought some cool things and got herself a Raspberry Ripple Milkshake from the Chilly Wizard man. I was looking quite carefully, but he still didn't have a pointy hat or a staff so I call shenanigans on him being magical. I think he just makes really yummy ice cream.
Today I have been very mimpy indeed. My toothies are being a pain in the, erm, mouth. So I am spreading the pain around by doing most of my business in Shriek all say long. I even managed to give Daddy a headache by sheer volume earlier, that'll teach him not to pop those teeth for me when I want him to. I don't care how he does it, I'll take pliers or experimental dental surgery at this point.
I also managed to really get him good earlier by pooing nicely whilst he was in the middle of changing the first half of the poopy nappy. He shouldn't have been quite so quick to lay me down, should he? I mean you'd think he'd have figured out what a little wotsit I am with the nappy changes by now, and pooing in mid-change takes me to a whole new level of sheer, bloody-minded awkwardness. That's what Daddy says anyway, and as his dutiful little girl who am I to argue?
See the butter in my mouth? Not melting.
Mummy and Amber are going to do lots of baking in half-term. So they picked up a recipe book in Christchurch and we all went to Sainsbury's to pick up ingredients before my last feed. Mummy and Daddy had a playfight over who got to push me when we were in there. In the end Daddy jumped up on Mummy and she nearly had to give him a piggyback until we got home. At one point he grabbed the trolley and backed off, calling 'Toro, Toro!' and got a ding. I don't know what a Toro is, but I don't think Mummy appreciated being compared to one. Silly Daddy.
I didn't want to go to bed when we got back though. Mummy and Daddy ought to have figured out that if I manage to get a little 15 minute Powernap before my last feed I'm going to be impossible to get down straight away. And tonight I managed to drop off on the way back from Sainsbury's.
So in the end after much upset and Headflinging upstairs in the bedroom, Daddy took me out the back garden in my baby sleeping bag and my famous yellow blanky. He stood so the wind wouldn't get me very much and cuddled me and sang to me until I went to sleep. I must find his singing and the sound of the wind whistling through the trees very soothing indeed.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Friday 24 October 2008
Violence, Mayhem, Ducks
Utter chaos ensued at Mudeford Quay tonight. First Daddy was trying to get revenge on Amber for trying to annoy him by talking through his headphones at him in the car, and he let the car door swing back when she had her hands full of bread so she'd have to put the bread down to open it again. But she didn't notice.
Ding!
Then whilst nursing her sore head, she tripped up coming out of the car and the loaf she was holding swung out and hit Daddy right between the legs.
Ding!
Then when we got the harbour, Amber wouldn't stop singing the really annoying bit from 'The Lion Sleeps Tonight' so Mummy advanced on her and swung a loaf at her - but she tried to avoid it, tripped over and went backwards onto the floor.
Ding!
But it wasn't over, because Mummy was laughing so hard by now that she wasn't paying very much attention to where she was throwing, and she hit a duck in the beak with a slice of bread.
Ding!
I consider myself rather lucky to have escaped the carnage. Specially as Daddy kind of owed me one for managing to get poo all over him earlier when I had an escaped detonation and I kicked my little poopy legs at him.
I'd had some good fun with him out the garden before I fired it off though. We even saw Katie do her first poo of the day in the Poo Pit when we swapped the bunnies out together. She squatted down on the edge and then gradually kind of edged backwards, inch by inch before deciding she'd found a comfy spot. It was very strange how precise she was.
Daddy was back at his silly gaming tonight though, playing his 'bluff Yorkshireman' Albert Woolshaggery in Uncle Julian's Hawkmoon game. Uncle Julian has assured Mummy that he really did randomly role a Grim Northerner and this wasn't just him being mean about Yorkshireness. What are the odds?
So anyway, because Daddy wasn't here naturally I decided I would have some quality time with just myself and Mummy after Amber went to bed. So I stayed awake till gone 9 even though my last feed was at 8, wasn't that kind of me?
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Ding!
Then whilst nursing her sore head, she tripped up coming out of the car and the loaf she was holding swung out and hit Daddy right between the legs.
Ding!
Then when we got the harbour, Amber wouldn't stop singing the really annoying bit from 'The Lion Sleeps Tonight' so Mummy advanced on her and swung a loaf at her - but she tried to avoid it, tripped over and went backwards onto the floor.
Ding!
But it wasn't over, because Mummy was laughing so hard by now that she wasn't paying very much attention to where she was throwing, and she hit a duck in the beak with a slice of bread.
Ding!
I consider myself rather lucky to have escaped the carnage. Specially as Daddy kind of owed me one for managing to get poo all over him earlier when I had an escaped detonation and I kicked my little poopy legs at him.
I'd had some good fun with him out the garden before I fired it off though. We even saw Katie do her first poo of the day in the Poo Pit when we swapped the bunnies out together. She squatted down on the edge and then gradually kind of edged backwards, inch by inch before deciding she'd found a comfy spot. It was very strange how precise she was.
Daddy was back at his silly gaming tonight though, playing his 'bluff Yorkshireman' Albert Woolshaggery in Uncle Julian's Hawkmoon game. Uncle Julian has assured Mummy that he really did randomly role a Grim Northerner and this wasn't just him being mean about Yorkshireness. What are the odds?
So anyway, because Daddy wasn't here naturally I decided I would have some quality time with just myself and Mummy after Amber went to bed. So I stayed awake till gone 9 even though my last feed was at 8, wasn't that kind of me?
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Thursday 23 October 2008
Today I Have Been Mostly Napping
I got woken up first thing in the morning at 6 o'clock by Mummy and Daddy today. Actually woken up before I had slept my fill, can you imagine that? I was so shocked at this blatant flouting of the parent-baby conventions that I just noshed the entire thing without really remembering to be awkward about it. But the one good thing was that I got to have some sissy time with Amber before she went off to school.
Even more shocking was what happened at 8 o'clock - Mummy got up and let Daddy go back to bed. The world is turning upside down, it really is.
The reason I was woken up bright and early was that I was supposed to go to baby swimming with Mummy and get in the pool at 11, so I needed my feed to be just after 9. But dyu know what, I really didn't feel in the mood today, so I decided to detonate an actual Size Eight in my nappy at 10 o'clock to help delay matters and then decided to use my baby self-hypnosis to put myself to sleep just at the wrong time. So no swimming for Lulu today, especially when Mummy realised that she would have to wake Daddy to get towels out of the airing cupboard to go swimming with anyway.
So after the deadline was finished, I woke myself up and pretended to be sooooooo upset about missing swimming, and we went to wake Daddy. He was pretty hammered still by the looks of it - and he made a very rude gesture indeed at Mummy when she suggested that I should jump on him to wake him up properly.
After lunch we went to Mudeford Quay - and I promptly fell asleep in the car for a while. Mummy and Daddy just stayed in the car and chatted while I had my Powernap, and by the time I woke up we needed to get back for the next feed. This was mean, I wanted to play with the gulls and the swans! So when we got home I expressed my displeasure in a very polite and reasoned manner for the next couple of hours. Right in Daddy's ear.
Daddy rallied magnificently though, and off he went to fetch Amber from the bus stop. When they came back I had loads of Big Sister Time in her room. We played lots of funny games and I managed to cuddle lots of toys, bonus!
I love my Big Sister Time. She is helping me learn my words just like Mummy and Daddy are, and she is also coming up with lots of new choruses of Coming Round The Mountain. And she has more cuddly toys than you can shake a stick at, what a lucky thing she is. Soon I'll be big enough to play with Skullsplitter the Barbarian Baby Bear as well, that'll be so cool!
Well I thought I was going to have to give it up and miss Mummy at bedtime tonight, as normally on Thursday night she goes to the pub to see her friend Dan, but as luck would have it he was doing an early shift today and Mummy had forgotten, so she suddenly got a phone call at 6.15 and went rushing out of the door after realising she was very late indeed. So what this meant was that she would be back at 7.30 instead of 9.30.
I was so chuffed I forgot to be a total pain in the bum with my next feed and fell asleep with it. Damn!
Mummy came back from the pub as she was supposed to, but her tummy was feeling very wobbly and so she couldn't snuggle me. So here she was, unexpectedly available, and I couldn't take advantage of it. I was really, really not impressed and I let Daddy know about it in no uncertain terms. I think even he didn't know some of the ruder Shriek words I was using. In the end he had to sit me down in front of the Pretties he sometimes puts on the puter for me so I could watch them dance in time to his noisy music and play with the keyboard.
Its amazing how many times I could hit just the right keys to mess up his listening pleasure.
However, despite the setback of Mummy's tummy I was determined to have my last feed with her, so I decided to be a real pain for Daddy so she would offer to take me instead. And my cunning plan worked really well too, as that's exactly what happened. However by the time my feed had finished Mummy's special telly programme with all the dead people and the lady whose boots Daddy is always admiring in it had started, so I was denied my bedtime Mummy snuggles and had to settle for Daddy instead.
I tried to fight the sleep, but my heart just wasn't in it. My little cot is just too comfy for words, and I'd defy anyone not to crash out in it. So as Daddy types this I will be fast asleep, waking up between now and the morning only to yell blue murder should I decide I want the dummy back if it has dissappeared from the vicinity.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Even more shocking was what happened at 8 o'clock - Mummy got up and let Daddy go back to bed. The world is turning upside down, it really is.
The reason I was woken up bright and early was that I was supposed to go to baby swimming with Mummy and get in the pool at 11, so I needed my feed to be just after 9. But dyu know what, I really didn't feel in the mood today, so I decided to detonate an actual Size Eight in my nappy at 10 o'clock to help delay matters and then decided to use my baby self-hypnosis to put myself to sleep just at the wrong time. So no swimming for Lulu today, especially when Mummy realised that she would have to wake Daddy to get towels out of the airing cupboard to go swimming with anyway.
So after the deadline was finished, I woke myself up and pretended to be sooooooo upset about missing swimming, and we went to wake Daddy. He was pretty hammered still by the looks of it - and he made a very rude gesture indeed at Mummy when she suggested that I should jump on him to wake him up properly.
After lunch we went to Mudeford Quay - and I promptly fell asleep in the car for a while. Mummy and Daddy just stayed in the car and chatted while I had my Powernap, and by the time I woke up we needed to get back for the next feed. This was mean, I wanted to play with the gulls and the swans! So when we got home I expressed my displeasure in a very polite and reasoned manner for the next couple of hours. Right in Daddy's ear.
Daddy rallied magnificently though, and off he went to fetch Amber from the bus stop. When they came back I had loads of Big Sister Time in her room. We played lots of funny games and I managed to cuddle lots of toys, bonus!
I love my Big Sister Time. She is helping me learn my words just like Mummy and Daddy are, and she is also coming up with lots of new choruses of Coming Round The Mountain. And she has more cuddly toys than you can shake a stick at, what a lucky thing she is. Soon I'll be big enough to play with Skullsplitter the Barbarian Baby Bear as well, that'll be so cool!
Well I thought I was going to have to give it up and miss Mummy at bedtime tonight, as normally on Thursday night she goes to the pub to see her friend Dan, but as luck would have it he was doing an early shift today and Mummy had forgotten, so she suddenly got a phone call at 6.15 and went rushing out of the door after realising she was very late indeed. So what this meant was that she would be back at 7.30 instead of 9.30.
I was so chuffed I forgot to be a total pain in the bum with my next feed and fell asleep with it. Damn!
Mummy came back from the pub as she was supposed to, but her tummy was feeling very wobbly and so she couldn't snuggle me. So here she was, unexpectedly available, and I couldn't take advantage of it. I was really, really not impressed and I let Daddy know about it in no uncertain terms. I think even he didn't know some of the ruder Shriek words I was using. In the end he had to sit me down in front of the Pretties he sometimes puts on the puter for me so I could watch them dance in time to his noisy music and play with the keyboard.
Its amazing how many times I could hit just the right keys to mess up his listening pleasure.
However, despite the setback of Mummy's tummy I was determined to have my last feed with her, so I decided to be a real pain for Daddy so she would offer to take me instead. And my cunning plan worked really well too, as that's exactly what happened. However by the time my feed had finished Mummy's special telly programme with all the dead people and the lady whose boots Daddy is always admiring in it had started, so I was denied my bedtime Mummy snuggles and had to settle for Daddy instead.
I tried to fight the sleep, but my heart just wasn't in it. My little cot is just too comfy for words, and I'd defy anyone not to crash out in it. So as Daddy types this I will be fast asleep, waking up between now and the morning only to yell blue murder should I decide I want the dummy back if it has dissappeared from the vicinity.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Mummy Passed The Test, And Will Remain Nothing Like Galadriel
I went to the library with Daddy yesterday. Mummy needed to get prepared for her Uber Driving Theory Test Of Doom and I was being a bit of a mimper because I knew she was going out soon and wouldn't be back for a long time, so he strapped me into the Tank and off we went, leaving her to stress in peace.
Daddy seems to know a lot of people in Christchurch. It seems like every two minutes we were stopping to chat with pregnant ladies, older ladies, ladies with children and even the lady behind the counter in the library started handing him things when we were in there. Daddy ummed and aahed and wasnt sure whether or not to tell Mummy that the pregnant lady's baby was actually overdue but her bump only looked like Mummy's did at about four months.
When he did later on, Mummy just said 'I hate you' and walked off in a huff. Daddy should have resisted the temptation, but then Daddy is really, really bad at that.
Anyway, after we got back from our walk I had a little sleep after crashing out in the Tank, which is definitely more comfy than the ones Grandad used to drive by all accounts. When I woke up Mummy still wasn't home. I was so outraged that I completely refused to nosh the feed Daddy gave me and I think he felt a bit stressed that I hadn't had any lunch. Neither had he of course, serves him right for not getting Mummy back quicker.
However Daddy is nothing if not persistent, and he calmed me down and stopped me screaming my head off eventually and got me a fresh bottle. I suddenly realised there was a big hole in my tummy where the milk should be and actually noshed this one. I think Daddy felt quite chuffed.
In the middle of that feed Mummy rang in with good news - she scored 95% on her test! Daddy was very pleased for her and when we finished the feed he gave me a burping and then stood me on the desk in front of him and we did a little victory dance to Adrenalin O.D.'s version of the Baby Elephant Walk. This, however, shifted what was also part of the reason I hadn't wanted the first feed.
One poopy nappy change later (and my wasn't Daddy lucky that Mummy came in part way through to stop me flinging myself happily about and making things considerably harder than they needed to be) and it was shading towards one of the favourite parts of my day - Amber Time!
Whenever Daddy can, he goes down to the bus stop to pick up my big sister from there so he can have some nice time with her as she walks back and find out how her day at Big Big School has been. Today however she had forgotten her bus fare so Mummy took me in the car to pick her up so daddy could get on with some housework. But even though I didn't really feel like a drive, Mummy made me go with her anyway. How dare she not take the hint of nearly an hour's solid screaming?
Later on and Mummy was nursing a headache which had mysteriously appeared during the ride to Amber's school. Because we were now having a mild evening, Daddy took me out the back garden in my yellow blanky and Amber came out with us. At first Daddy pretended he couldn't find her by always turning away from her and making her do really silly things to stay in our sight. This made me giggle a lot.
Then Daddy decided to do his best impression of a man called Davidattunburr. He put on a very breathless and silly voice and pretended to be hunting Amber, only he called her the 'very rare Lesser Grinning Idjit' and said she could be tracked by her spoor of coats, purses and pencil cases. Amber tried very hard to be outraged but ended up not being able to help giggling in the end. It seems my sissy is being a bit careless with some of the things she takes to school, and Daddy is getting a bit miffed off with her about it.
We had a really good time out in the garden. When we got back in however I made really sure that there would be no escape to hockey practice for Mummy and her headache, no sir! So I detonated a serious Size Seven in my nappy, which then exploded out onto my leg. And so Mummy helped Daddy by holding my little tentacles away from my bottom. By the time we were done and I had screamed a bit more it was late enough and Mummy's head was banging enough that she blew out hockey practice, yay for me!
So at bedtime I got Mummy cuddles even though I wasn't supposed to - I think I'm getting rather good at this...
Daddy seems to know a lot of people in Christchurch. It seems like every two minutes we were stopping to chat with pregnant ladies, older ladies, ladies with children and even the lady behind the counter in the library started handing him things when we were in there. Daddy ummed and aahed and wasnt sure whether or not to tell Mummy that the pregnant lady's baby was actually overdue but her bump only looked like Mummy's did at about four months.
When he did later on, Mummy just said 'I hate you' and walked off in a huff. Daddy should have resisted the temptation, but then Daddy is really, really bad at that.
Anyway, after we got back from our walk I had a little sleep after crashing out in the Tank, which is definitely more comfy than the ones Grandad used to drive by all accounts. When I woke up Mummy still wasn't home. I was so outraged that I completely refused to nosh the feed Daddy gave me and I think he felt a bit stressed that I hadn't had any lunch. Neither had he of course, serves him right for not getting Mummy back quicker.
However Daddy is nothing if not persistent, and he calmed me down and stopped me screaming my head off eventually and got me a fresh bottle. I suddenly realised there was a big hole in my tummy where the milk should be and actually noshed this one. I think Daddy felt quite chuffed.
In the middle of that feed Mummy rang in with good news - she scored 95% on her test! Daddy was very pleased for her and when we finished the feed he gave me a burping and then stood me on the desk in front of him and we did a little victory dance to Adrenalin O.D.'s version of the Baby Elephant Walk. This, however, shifted what was also part of the reason I hadn't wanted the first feed.
One poopy nappy change later (and my wasn't Daddy lucky that Mummy came in part way through to stop me flinging myself happily about and making things considerably harder than they needed to be) and it was shading towards one of the favourite parts of my day - Amber Time!
Whenever Daddy can, he goes down to the bus stop to pick up my big sister from there so he can have some nice time with her as she walks back and find out how her day at Big Big School has been. Today however she had forgotten her bus fare so Mummy took me in the car to pick her up so daddy could get on with some housework. But even though I didn't really feel like a drive, Mummy made me go with her anyway. How dare she not take the hint of nearly an hour's solid screaming?
Later on and Mummy was nursing a headache which had mysteriously appeared during the ride to Amber's school. Because we were now having a mild evening, Daddy took me out the back garden in my yellow blanky and Amber came out with us. At first Daddy pretended he couldn't find her by always turning away from her and making her do really silly things to stay in our sight. This made me giggle a lot.
Then Daddy decided to do his best impression of a man called Davidattunburr. He put on a very breathless and silly voice and pretended to be hunting Amber, only he called her the 'very rare Lesser Grinning Idjit' and said she could be tracked by her spoor of coats, purses and pencil cases. Amber tried very hard to be outraged but ended up not being able to help giggling in the end. It seems my sissy is being a bit careless with some of the things she takes to school, and Daddy is getting a bit miffed off with her about it.
We had a really good time out in the garden. When we got back in however I made really sure that there would be no escape to hockey practice for Mummy and her headache, no sir! So I detonated a serious Size Seven in my nappy, which then exploded out onto my leg. And so Mummy helped Daddy by holding my little tentacles away from my bottom. By the time we were done and I had screamed a bit more it was late enough and Mummy's head was banging enough that she blew out hockey practice, yay for me!
So at bedtime I got Mummy cuddles even though I wasn't supposed to - I think I'm getting rather good at this...
Tuesday 21 October 2008
Beaches, Buggies, More Shiny Things, Apologies And Shameless Plugging
I walked the beach to Granny and Grandad's today! Yep, I got to do that thing that Daddy and Amber often do but Mummy will never do.
Well, I say walked, what that means obviously is that Daddy pushed me along in the Tank for ages and ages and I got to enjoy sun, sea and sand. Bits of it must have hurt as well, cos even though the Tank is an all-terrain vehicle with big wheels and suspension and all that jazz, its still not easy pushing a quarter-ton of buggy and baby through soft sand for several hundred metres, which is what Daddy had to do when we got to the bit where Amber and Daddy normally play chicken with the tide (and Amber loses, bless her).
Pity in many ways that I slept through most of it really.
I missed the Big Digger doing its digging too, Daddy says. I reckon I would have liked that a lot. Ah well, maybe next time. What I did manage to see was the two Coastal Protection chappies and their doggy. Their doggy is a big black doggy, and Amber and Daddy met them before when they were having a tea break by the bench Amber and Daddy had a rest on.
You see Amber and Daddy were admiring the doggy, who was sat behind their van. Then the two men started the engine and Daddy jumped up and yelled at them because he thought they were going to leave the doggy behind or even worse maybe run her over! But it turns out that she is used to them doing this and she runs along the promenade behind the van all day when they are working. She looked like a very good runner when Daddy pointed her out to me.
The waves were really pounding in, and Daddy kept trying to get me to look out at the sea. But I preferred looking up at the cliffs, because Daddy told me they have loads and loads of wild bunny rabbits in them. Apparently the bunnies make loads of burrows in the lower slopes of the cliffs (and trust me, there's a good reason why the place Granny and Grandad live is called 'Highcliffe'). I was a bit disappointed when we couldn't spot any, but then again Daddy was looking out over the sea and being all awestruck and wussy so he probably wouldn't have seen anything if ten of them had stood on the slopes and recited Pocoyo scripts with a bullhorn.
Once we reached the end of the promenade we had to go up the roadway that the Diggers and the Coastal Protection people use to get down to the beach. It is very steep indeed and Daddy was looking a little...red when we reached the end.
When we got to Granny's she cooked Daddy his favourite lunch - boiled egg sandwiches. We sat in the dining room like civilised folk in Grandad's computer chair and I demonstrated my alien superstrength by managing to grab and pull the entire tablecloth with everyone's lunch on it several inches towards me. I'd have had the whole lot down if Daddy hadn't stopped me, the big spoilsport.
I actually let Grandad have a good cuddle today for once. It was only when he put me higher up to lay my head on his shoulder that I realised that Daddy had strayed at least six feet away from me. I wasn't having any of that nonsense so I let the bottom lip wobble like the opening note of a dodgy folk song, then let rip.
Daddy cuddles are just better.
Later on Mummy came over to Granny's after finishing her revision for the day. She and Daddy took me to see the other purveyor of the shiny things, not-Auntie-Christine. She is the lady that sold Amber her huge poster of 75 gemstones when Amber was only about five and was really amazed at how much she already knew about shiny things. She has a huge black doggy called Hendrix who is sometimes in the shop and is really sweet.
Unfortunately I wasn't...brilliantly behaved, let's say. After a few minutes of cooing Mummy took me over to see some of the gemstones in the thick glass containers just in case there happens to be one or two that Amber actually doesn't have, and I managed to get hold of the Carnelian container and sort tip them all onto the floor. A bit.
Daddy did that thing where his eyebrows go up at Mummy and explained that it might be a bit better if I wasn't allowed within tentacle's reach of anything grabbable. So Mummy handed me over to him and he showed me more shiny things. From a distance.
Thing was, I was feeling a bit hard done by. It was only one container full after all, its not like they were really shiny, after all. So I decided to show my displeasure with a nice big chunder. All over Daddy's arm. And down his trousers. And on the carpet too.
Mummy and Daddy were very embarassed and very apologetic. So they should be too, not letting me play with all the shininess! So we went back to Granny's and went home to await the return of Amber so we could tell her all about our day.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Daddy's Note: The store in question is Precious Pebbles, and the owner has always made time for Amber and explained/discussed mining and extraction processes, markets, artificial growing and all kinds of technical stuff to her from a very early age, when a lot of proprietors might have been completely disinterested in engaging with a small child. She has given us many discounts and directed us to new and rare stones to add to Amber's collection, and has enhanced her education in her Gemology/Geology hobby no end. So if you are looking for something shiny to give for Christmas, please click the link and I am sure you will agree you could do a lot worse than this as a way to say thanks on our behalf. And also, sorry about the chunder on the carpet.
Well, I say walked, what that means obviously is that Daddy pushed me along in the Tank for ages and ages and I got to enjoy sun, sea and sand. Bits of it must have hurt as well, cos even though the Tank is an all-terrain vehicle with big wheels and suspension and all that jazz, its still not easy pushing a quarter-ton of buggy and baby through soft sand for several hundred metres, which is what Daddy had to do when we got to the bit where Amber and Daddy normally play chicken with the tide (and Amber loses, bless her).
Pity in many ways that I slept through most of it really.
I missed the Big Digger doing its digging too, Daddy says. I reckon I would have liked that a lot. Ah well, maybe next time. What I did manage to see was the two Coastal Protection chappies and their doggy. Their doggy is a big black doggy, and Amber and Daddy met them before when they were having a tea break by the bench Amber and Daddy had a rest on.
You see Amber and Daddy were admiring the doggy, who was sat behind their van. Then the two men started the engine and Daddy jumped up and yelled at them because he thought they were going to leave the doggy behind or even worse maybe run her over! But it turns out that she is used to them doing this and she runs along the promenade behind the van all day when they are working. She looked like a very good runner when Daddy pointed her out to me.
The waves were really pounding in, and Daddy kept trying to get me to look out at the sea. But I preferred looking up at the cliffs, because Daddy told me they have loads and loads of wild bunny rabbits in them. Apparently the bunnies make loads of burrows in the lower slopes of the cliffs (and trust me, there's a good reason why the place Granny and Grandad live is called 'Highcliffe'). I was a bit disappointed when we couldn't spot any, but then again Daddy was looking out over the sea and being all awestruck and wussy so he probably wouldn't have seen anything if ten of them had stood on the slopes and recited Pocoyo scripts with a bullhorn.
Once we reached the end of the promenade we had to go up the roadway that the Diggers and the Coastal Protection people use to get down to the beach. It is very steep indeed and Daddy was looking a little...red when we reached the end.
When we got to Granny's she cooked Daddy his favourite lunch - boiled egg sandwiches. We sat in the dining room like civilised folk in Grandad's computer chair and I demonstrated my alien superstrength by managing to grab and pull the entire tablecloth with everyone's lunch on it several inches towards me. I'd have had the whole lot down if Daddy hadn't stopped me, the big spoilsport.
I actually let Grandad have a good cuddle today for once. It was only when he put me higher up to lay my head on his shoulder that I realised that Daddy had strayed at least six feet away from me. I wasn't having any of that nonsense so I let the bottom lip wobble like the opening note of a dodgy folk song, then let rip.
Daddy cuddles are just better.
Later on Mummy came over to Granny's after finishing her revision for the day. She and Daddy took me to see the other purveyor of the shiny things, not-Auntie-Christine. She is the lady that sold Amber her huge poster of 75 gemstones when Amber was only about five and was really amazed at how much she already knew about shiny things. She has a huge black doggy called Hendrix who is sometimes in the shop and is really sweet.
Unfortunately I wasn't...brilliantly behaved, let's say. After a few minutes of cooing Mummy took me over to see some of the gemstones in the thick glass containers just in case there happens to be one or two that Amber actually doesn't have, and I managed to get hold of the Carnelian container and sort tip them all onto the floor. A bit.
Daddy did that thing where his eyebrows go up at Mummy and explained that it might be a bit better if I wasn't allowed within tentacle's reach of anything grabbable. So Mummy handed me over to him and he showed me more shiny things. From a distance.
Thing was, I was feeling a bit hard done by. It was only one container full after all, its not like they were really shiny, after all. So I decided to show my displeasure with a nice big chunder. All over Daddy's arm. And down his trousers. And on the carpet too.
Mummy and Daddy were very embarassed and very apologetic. So they should be too, not letting me play with all the shininess! So we went back to Granny's and went home to await the return of Amber so we could tell her all about our day.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Daddy's Note: The store in question is Precious Pebbles, and the owner has always made time for Amber and explained/discussed mining and extraction processes, markets, artificial growing and all kinds of technical stuff to her from a very early age, when a lot of proprietors might have been completely disinterested in engaging with a small child. She has given us many discounts and directed us to new and rare stones to add to Amber's collection, and has enhanced her education in her Gemology/Geology hobby no end. So if you are looking for something shiny to give for Christmas, please click the link and I am sure you will agree you could do a lot worse than this as a way to say thanks on our behalf. And also, sorry about the chunder on the carpet.
Monday 20 October 2008
Shiny Things
Mummy and Daddy took me to Christchurch today, and we bought lots of stuff - apples and grapes from the fruity people, sweeties from the sweety stall for the Charity stall my big sister is running this week at her big school, and Daddy even got a huge bread thingy with loads of really unhealthy food in it from the burger van. It was even Mummy's idea, because she needed to go straight off to the pub to sit and do tons of revision for her special test on Wednesday as soon as we were done and there was no way I was going to let Daddy cook anything properly today.
My toothies are really getting at me this week. I am not letting anyone get away with any of that fancy 'leisurely meal' business, no sir. I want my comfort cuddles when I want my comfort cuddles, and delaying tactics like sleeping are not going to be an obstacle if I can help it.
Anyway, while we were there we went to see my friend Christine. She works in the place with all the pretty shiny things in it, and she is one of my biggest fans. She always gives me cuddles and coos over me for ages.
Christine is also my big sister's friend, in fact when she started working at the shiny things shop Amber taught her lots of things about the shiny things - what their names are, where they come from, how they are dug out of the ground and all that. She is named after a shiny thing, after all.
Once a few years ago, Amber made Christine a special drawing with lots of the shiny things in it. Now it lives in a special folder Christine uses for all her college work and she takes it in whenever she has a special test like the one Mummy's having this week. She says it's her good luck charm.
Not long after Amber made Christine the special good luck drawing, Christine gave Amber a huge piece of this shiny stuff that hadn't been properly cut to be supershiny. It's bigger than my hand! Awesome huh?
My big sister is super-clever. I think she knows everything there is to know about the shiny things, and one of her books about them weighs as much as I do, and it's nearly as big, too.
The best part is that she actually has hundreds of the shiny things upstairs in special cases. She even has a special shiny thing that isn't actually that shiny but has to stay inside its case because its poisonous and no one can touch it! Its called Wulfenite and its really funny looking.
She has a poster with seventy-five (!) different shiny things on it and she already has a piece of nearly 60 of the 75, how cool is that? One day she wants to own one of every single thing on it. She'll probably do it too, she is very persistent about this kind of thing.
Daddy's favourite is a piece of green quartz from a place called Madagascar. He loves to look at that piece nearly as much as Amber does.
Anyway after all that shiny things talk I am off to sleep now. I hope my toothies don't make me start howling at 1am again. And 2am as well. And 3...well, you get the picture.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
My toothies are really getting at me this week. I am not letting anyone get away with any of that fancy 'leisurely meal' business, no sir. I want my comfort cuddles when I want my comfort cuddles, and delaying tactics like sleeping are not going to be an obstacle if I can help it.
Anyway, while we were there we went to see my friend Christine. She works in the place with all the pretty shiny things in it, and she is one of my biggest fans. She always gives me cuddles and coos over me for ages.
Christine is also my big sister's friend, in fact when she started working at the shiny things shop Amber taught her lots of things about the shiny things - what their names are, where they come from, how they are dug out of the ground and all that. She is named after a shiny thing, after all.
Once a few years ago, Amber made Christine a special drawing with lots of the shiny things in it. Now it lives in a special folder Christine uses for all her college work and she takes it in whenever she has a special test like the one Mummy's having this week. She says it's her good luck charm.
Not long after Amber made Christine the special good luck drawing, Christine gave Amber a huge piece of this shiny stuff that hadn't been properly cut to be supershiny. It's bigger than my hand! Awesome huh?
My big sister is super-clever. I think she knows everything there is to know about the shiny things, and one of her books about them weighs as much as I do, and it's nearly as big, too.
The best part is that she actually has hundreds of the shiny things upstairs in special cases. She even has a special shiny thing that isn't actually that shiny but has to stay inside its case because its poisonous and no one can touch it! Its called Wulfenite and its really funny looking.
She has a poster with seventy-five (!) different shiny things on it and she already has a piece of nearly 60 of the 75, how cool is that? One day she wants to own one of every single thing on it. She'll probably do it too, she is very persistent about this kind of thing.
Daddy's favourite is a piece of green quartz from a place called Madagascar. He loves to look at that piece nearly as much as Amber does.
Anyway after all that shiny things talk I am off to sleep now. I hope my toothies don't make me start howling at 1am again. And 2am as well. And 3...well, you get the picture.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Saturday 18 October 2008
The Great Sort-Of Escape
After Granny She and Grandad Butterworth came for breakfast, Daddy had a phone call from my friend Jenni. She is a very nice lady who used to come and play with my big sister a lot before Daddy even met Mummy but, and apparently this is very important to point out, never ever played with Daddy. Don't know why, I like playing with him, after all he is lots of fun.
Anyway, Jenni (who refers to my Daddy as Donkey Boy, not sure what that's all about either) wanted to bring her baby Lilyana, her Big Brother Dandan and their Daddy Chrisboo to play with me. Wasn't that kind? So after Granny and Grandad went off to London to see Aunty Holly, they came over so they could pay homage to the wonderfulness that is me.
Well they were suitably cooing, but there was also a lot of cooing going on over Lilyana as well as she kept walking between the grownups with her arms out. This is one of her New Things apparently, like my Late Night Poopoos and Standing On The Furniture. Everyone seemed very impressed, I just watched very intently and took notes. After all, anything that earns this much cooing's gotta be worth a go.
My big sister took Dan up to her room and they played for a while. They seemed to have a good time judging by the thumpity bumpityness going on. After a good play Dandan even got to go and help Amber do the Swapping of the Bunnies, but he had to stay on the patio in case he got bunny poo all over his trainers. Daddy told everyone a funny story about how a little boy called Flynn wouldn't do that one day and fell arms first right into the bunnies' Poo Pit at the end of the garden. Oopsy, that can't have been nice!
The Poo Pit is where our rabbits mostly go to toilet. Daddy says it's like a trap in one of his roleplaying games because the soil has gotten so fertile from all the poo that it is almost all grown over with really lush plants now and you can't see it and need to make a big Spot Roll to not step in it. But even though it's pretty gross, it's very handy because we don't need to clean Mister Scruffles or Syco out as often as we might do if it didn't exist. When we let Mister Scruffles out in the morning the first thing he does is rush up there and sit on his hindpaws looking all...relieved.
As it was a nice day I decided we should all go down to Christchurch Quay and see the seagulls again like I did yesterday. But when we got there, though there were quite a few and Mummy had to duck once or twice to avoid a wing buffet, it still wasn't as crazy as yesterday. I didn't get a chance to grab another gull this time, dammit!
After we fed the ducks, swans, seagulls and cygnets we went to the Playground. I like the playground, there is usually lots of children in it and adults to coo over me, plus I get strapped into a hoodie top on the swingswongs and giggle and giggle as Mummy and Daddy push me backwards and forwards.
However after I did my swingswong, Dandan decided to give Amber a race across the green. He likes to run a long way when he's in the mood, his Daddy said. And he certainly ran off very far and she didn't seem able to keep up, which was a bit odd as he's four and she's twelve. In the end Daddy had to go and run after him and bring him back and no matter how hard he tried to run off, Daddy managed to catch him up. But then Daddy's even older than Amber so he must be really fit and sporty, right?
Daddy says that anyone reading the Blog may consider this sentence a Straight Face.
Once Dandan's sort-of-escape was over Amber saw her friend Alice helping her little sister around the climbing frame. I want to try that soon, the climbing frame looks like good fun. It has ropes and bars and poles and a slide, I'll be spoilt for choice!
Alice hadn't met me yet, so she came and had a good coo over me while Mummy changed my nappy on the bench. Once she had finished worshipping me we decided it was time to go, and so we said goodbye to everyone and headed home.
What a day it was, all these people coming to see me. Because I was feeling thoroughly content with all the attention I'd received I decided not to play up with my last feed tonight, besides this time it was Mummy giving it to me instead of Daddy, bonus! However, thinking about it as I'm dictating this to Daddy whilst lying in my little cot, it's Daddy who's going to get me to sleep tonight so I've been kind of cheated again...
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
So Close But Yet So Far
You know how I always wanted to grab one my my shrieky seagull friends and bring him home to play? Weeeell, I managed to do the first bit today down at Christchurch Quay!
See, Granny She and Grandad Butterworth came down to see me yesterday, and we went down to the Quay so they could see me feed the birdies. And they certainly picked the right day because there were huge swarms of seagulls down with the boats. Mummy reckons there must have been at least fifty, that's like all the seagulls in the whole wide world!
Normally Daddy holds me while Mummy feeds the birdies, but he had to go home as my big sister was due in from school soon so he had to be there to let her in. So to make it easier Mummy knelt down with me to throw bread up in the air for the seagulls, and thats where the fun started. See, because Mummy couldn't get the bread too high from down there, the seagulls had to swoop down really low, and one of the cheeky wotsits started hovering right in front of me and snatching the bread from her hand.
But you can't get in range of the Lulu tentacles without consequences, oh no. One good lunge as he came into land, and if Mummy hadn't been holding onto me I reckon I could have gotten more than the wingtip I did get. I am faster than a hovering seagull, me. Daddy says this is further proof that I am in fact an alien.
On thing though. The seagull didn't seem best pleased when I demonstrated my superspeed, in fact he said some very rude words in Shriek as he flew backwards. I didn't know what half of them even meant, but I'm sure they weren't nice words.
Once I was done harassing the seagulls we went back home and Granny She and Grandad Butterworth went to check in to their hotel. Mummy played with me for a little while then went out to go and have dinner with Granny and Grandad, so come last feed time it was just Daddy and me again.
Well I had to play to the crowd, didn't I? So I gave Daddy all my best moves after about fifteen seconds of drinking - the Side-to-Side Headfling, the Throwback, the Arching Spine and of course the essential I-Don't-Feel-Like-Feeding-Just-Now-Thank-You Shriek, thus waking up my unfortunate big sister who had only just gone to bed.
But here's the thing. The last couple of nights these extremely effective delaying tactics have resulted in the Return Of The Mummy before bedtime. But this time Daddy was annoyingly persistent and after a good Yell break he only went and got me to drink over half the feed, didn't he? I must be falling down on the job, because I was so shattered after all that effort that I fell asleep about ten seconds after he got me in my Baby Sleeping Bag and laid me down in the cot.
And I still never got my seagull.
See, Granny She and Grandad Butterworth came down to see me yesterday, and we went down to the Quay so they could see me feed the birdies. And they certainly picked the right day because there were huge swarms of seagulls down with the boats. Mummy reckons there must have been at least fifty, that's like all the seagulls in the whole wide world!
Normally Daddy holds me while Mummy feeds the birdies, but he had to go home as my big sister was due in from school soon so he had to be there to let her in. So to make it easier Mummy knelt down with me to throw bread up in the air for the seagulls, and thats where the fun started. See, because Mummy couldn't get the bread too high from down there, the seagulls had to swoop down really low, and one of the cheeky wotsits started hovering right in front of me and snatching the bread from her hand.
But you can't get in range of the Lulu tentacles without consequences, oh no. One good lunge as he came into land, and if Mummy hadn't been holding onto me I reckon I could have gotten more than the wingtip I did get. I am faster than a hovering seagull, me. Daddy says this is further proof that I am in fact an alien.
On thing though. The seagull didn't seem best pleased when I demonstrated my superspeed, in fact he said some very rude words in Shriek as he flew backwards. I didn't know what half of them even meant, but I'm sure they weren't nice words.
Once I was done harassing the seagulls we went back home and Granny She and Grandad Butterworth went to check in to their hotel. Mummy played with me for a little while then went out to go and have dinner with Granny and Grandad, so come last feed time it was just Daddy and me again.
Well I had to play to the crowd, didn't I? So I gave Daddy all my best moves after about fifteen seconds of drinking - the Side-to-Side Headfling, the Throwback, the Arching Spine and of course the essential I-Don't-Feel-Like-Feeding-Just-Now-Thank-You Shriek, thus waking up my unfortunate big sister who had only just gone to bed.
But here's the thing. The last couple of nights these extremely effective delaying tactics have resulted in the Return Of The Mummy before bedtime. But this time Daddy was annoyingly persistent and after a good Yell break he only went and got me to drink over half the feed, didn't he? I must be falling down on the job, because I was so shattered after all that effort that I fell asleep about ten seconds after he got me in my Baby Sleeping Bag and laid me down in the cot.
And I still never got my seagull.
Friday 17 October 2008
Coming Round The Mountain Marathon
Up to twenty choruses and counting of variations on 'Coming Round The Mountain' including the everpopular "She'll Be Pooing In Her Nappy" and 'She'll Be Weeing Over Mummy'. I am riding on my big sister's leg and doing it all by myself without any encouragement.
Damn, I should have got sponsorship.
Damn, I should have got sponsorship.
Thursday 16 October 2008
Special Message For My Cuz
I am sending a special message to my cuz Emma to help her cheer up a bit as she is very down in the dumps. Here is a piccy of me to make you smile and realise that no matter how miserable you feel, there's always someone who looks even more miserable than you do!
Hugs and kisses,
Lulu
Birthday Girl
It was my big sister's actual birthday today, she is 12 years old. Daddy says he can't believe she has survived this long without bodily dismemberment by her closest relative i.e. him. Though I always thought bodily dismemberment was Syco's job. Certainly that suicidal Robin Redbreast coming back to play in the garden again today must be a prime candidate for the full treatment.
My big sister had lots of presents to open today, mostly from Mummy and Daddy. They bought her books and crossword puzzles and DVDs and some funny socks with skulls on. Aunty Hayley from all the way in London bought her a DVD, my Great-Aunty Jayney and Great-Uncle Bob bought her this very woolly coat thingummy, for a minute I thought they'd skinned a sheep and sent it in the post. Granny Butterworth sent her lots of money for new clothes, Great-Auntie Avril sent her a cool scrapbook and Granny and Grandad themselves just sent her lots of money to spend on whatever she likes!
Tomorrow Grandad Jonathan and Granny She are coming down all the way from Yorkshire. That's the place with all the hills Daddy's absolutely not allowed to make jokes about, ever, on pain of pain. I'm sure they will bring her a cool present too.
Amber seemed a bit stressed tonight, Birthday or not she had lots of homework and she was having trouble with a poem about a parrot. She also had to clean out Syco's hutch, which must be a very messy job what with all the bunny weewee, poo pellets and pieces of cat. But we had lots of playtime at bedtime while Daddy made my feed and then later on wrestled with her duvet cover after washing her sheets today. She even chilled me out and made me giggle when I was howling at waking up after falling asleep in the back garden with Daddy. I must have been tired, I almost never do that. It was a special night too, the first time I had been outside while it was cold enough for my breath to steam. Yay for my super yellow Blanky!
I made sure I stayed up for Mummy's return from seeing her friend Dan at the pub by the simple expedient of detonating another Size Six in my nappy in mid-feed. I think Daddy is getting a bit unamused by the late night poopoos. But I got my Mummy cuddles at bedtime, so I think I can live with his crushing disappointment.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
My big sister had lots of presents to open today, mostly from Mummy and Daddy. They bought her books and crossword puzzles and DVDs and some funny socks with skulls on. Aunty Hayley from all the way in London bought her a DVD, my Great-Aunty Jayney and Great-Uncle Bob bought her this very woolly coat thingummy, for a minute I thought they'd skinned a sheep and sent it in the post. Granny Butterworth sent her lots of money for new clothes, Great-Auntie Avril sent her a cool scrapbook and Granny and Grandad themselves just sent her lots of money to spend on whatever she likes!
Tomorrow Grandad Jonathan and Granny She are coming down all the way from Yorkshire. That's the place with all the hills Daddy's absolutely not allowed to make jokes about, ever, on pain of pain. I'm sure they will bring her a cool present too.
Amber seemed a bit stressed tonight, Birthday or not she had lots of homework and she was having trouble with a poem about a parrot. She also had to clean out Syco's hutch, which must be a very messy job what with all the bunny weewee, poo pellets and pieces of cat. But we had lots of playtime at bedtime while Daddy made my feed and then later on wrestled with her duvet cover after washing her sheets today. She even chilled me out and made me giggle when I was howling at waking up after falling asleep in the back garden with Daddy. I must have been tired, I almost never do that. It was a special night too, the first time I had been outside while it was cold enough for my breath to steam. Yay for my super yellow Blanky!
I made sure I stayed up for Mummy's return from seeing her friend Dan at the pub by the simple expedient of detonating another Size Six in my nappy in mid-feed. I think Daddy is getting a bit unamused by the late night poopoos. But I got my Mummy cuddles at bedtime, so I think I can live with his crushing disappointment.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Cooing Party
A strange thing happened last night. Mummy and Daddy put together a special surprise for me at my big sister's school. They got hundreds of Mummies and Daddies together in the Hall to come and coo over me! Wasn't that nice?
Granny and Grandad came over to look after Amber while we were gone and we drove off to the school in the dark. I spent a lot of time looking around at all the lights from the cars and streetlights and the like. When we got there I was confused when Daddy got me in my coat and out of the car because normally when we go to Amber's school I stay in the car and wait for her to come out. This time she didn't come out because she was already at home, and I got to go in!
Well, what a gathering. There were hundreds of Mummies and Daddies, and lots of banners with the grown-up 'rytin' on. I'm not sure but I guess they must have said 'Welcome Lulu' or something like that.
Lots of Mummies and Daddies smiled at me as we walked through the crowd, and some of them stopped Mummy and Daddy so they could have a quick coo. Frankie's Mummy was there too, and she cooed a lot and said how big I'd got even in the last few weeks since she'd seen me.
Mummy and Daddy talked to some of the Mummies and Daddies for quite a long time, especially the ones with the big badges on. But here was the funny thing - whenever Mummy and Daddy talked to the people with the big badges, all they seemed to want to talk about was my big sister! I hardly got a mention at all, it was most annoying.
I was still miffed about this when we left the school, and decided to be really crabby in the car on the way home. Unfortunately Mummy went straight off to hockey practice when we got home so I couldn't continue to vent at her, but once Granny and Grandad had gone home and Amber had gone to bed I decided to let Daddy feel the full force of my displeasure by refusing to touch half my last feed and then detonating a very pasty Size Seven in my nappy. Late night pooing, that's the new way to assert myself, yeah baby!
Hopefully now Mummy and Daddy have learned their lesson and next time they throw me a party they won't be rude enough to talk about how my big sister's doing at school instead of how wonderful and cute I am.
Granny and Grandad came over to look after Amber while we were gone and we drove off to the school in the dark. I spent a lot of time looking around at all the lights from the cars and streetlights and the like. When we got there I was confused when Daddy got me in my coat and out of the car because normally when we go to Amber's school I stay in the car and wait for her to come out. This time she didn't come out because she was already at home, and I got to go in!
Well, what a gathering. There were hundreds of Mummies and Daddies, and lots of banners with the grown-up 'rytin' on. I'm not sure but I guess they must have said 'Welcome Lulu' or something like that.
Lots of Mummies and Daddies smiled at me as we walked through the crowd, and some of them stopped Mummy and Daddy so they could have a quick coo. Frankie's Mummy was there too, and she cooed a lot and said how big I'd got even in the last few weeks since she'd seen me.
Mummy and Daddy talked to some of the Mummies and Daddies for quite a long time, especially the ones with the big badges on. But here was the funny thing - whenever Mummy and Daddy talked to the people with the big badges, all they seemed to want to talk about was my big sister! I hardly got a mention at all, it was most annoying.
I was still miffed about this when we left the school, and decided to be really crabby in the car on the way home. Unfortunately Mummy went straight off to hockey practice when we got home so I couldn't continue to vent at her, but once Granny and Grandad had gone home and Amber had gone to bed I decided to let Daddy feel the full force of my displeasure by refusing to touch half my last feed and then detonating a very pasty Size Seven in my nappy. Late night pooing, that's the new way to assert myself, yeah baby!
Hopefully now Mummy and Daddy have learned their lesson and next time they throw me a party they won't be rude enough to talk about how my big sister's doing at school instead of how wonderful and cute I am.
Footsie 100
I went to the Under 1's group with Mummy yesterday, and I met my friend Liam there after we saw him in the supermarket the other day. He is about a month bigger than me. Daddy says its highly amusing that I've already inherited Mummy's taste for Older Men, whatever that means.
My Mummy and Liam's Mummy sat opposite each other on the floor so Liam and I could have a proper chat. He speaks very good Gurgle, and quite good Shriek as well.
But then a funny thing happened. Liam and I discovered how much fun it is to tickle each other's feet with our own feet! Mummy says this is called Footsie. I like it, its a lot of fun to play and it made us both giggle a lot.
Daddy doesn't like touching Mummy's feet at all, though. I never see them playing that game. In fact come to think of it though she does giggle a lot when she tries to get him to play with them.
Funny that.
My Mummy and Liam's Mummy sat opposite each other on the floor so Liam and I could have a proper chat. He speaks very good Gurgle, and quite good Shriek as well.
But then a funny thing happened. Liam and I discovered how much fun it is to tickle each other's feet with our own feet! Mummy says this is called Footsie. I like it, its a lot of fun to play and it made us both giggle a lot.
Daddy doesn't like touching Mummy's feet at all, though. I never see them playing that game. In fact come to think of it though she does giggle a lot when she tries to get him to play with them.
Funny that.
Suicide Birdie
We have an ickle Robin Redbreast in our back garden. He appeared in the morning, and started bob-bobbing about. First he bob-bobbed onto the grass, then onto the fence. Then he bob-bobbed onto the bar underneath the table that Syco's hutch sits on and Daddy pointed him out to me through the patio door. I thought he was cute.
But through the day weird things begin to happen. First Daddy saw him bob-bob onto the table that Syco's hutch sits on and stand on it. Right next to the bars. Syco perked up at the chance to try and claw something, but then he seemed to come to his senses and fly off. But then later on after Syco and Mister Scruffles had been swapped out we heard my sicky-sister-who-felt-better-but-then-got-all-sicky-again-but-is-
now-feeling-better-a-second-time making a noise like a dying badger in the kitchen while she ate her tea. Daddy and I rushed out to see if she was all right but it turned out to be wheezy laughter.
The robin, it seems, had landed in front of Syco. She went all on the alert, ready to disembowel. But then it bob-bobbed very fast over to play with her and before she could do anything it had landed again - on her nose.
Apparently she went a bit, well, syco. But the thing was that being on her nose it was out of reach for any of her usual tactics - biting, clawing and especially kicking unless she wanted to concuss herself with her own back paws. So it got to fly off again unscathed, and Syco had a very embarassed tear around the garden to make herself feel better and settled back down to eating grass again.
Daddy and Amber are very impressed with the Robin Redbreast, though Daddy reckons she will be ready for it next time and all we will find will be a few little red feathers floating forlornly on the wind. But still, what a Brave Birdie he must be.
But through the day weird things begin to happen. First Daddy saw him bob-bob onto the table that Syco's hutch sits on and stand on it. Right next to the bars. Syco perked up at the chance to try and claw something, but then he seemed to come to his senses and fly off. But then later on after Syco and Mister Scruffles had been swapped out we heard my sicky-sister-who-felt-better-but-then-got-all-sicky-again-but-is-
now-feeling-better-a-second-time making a noise like a dying badger in the kitchen while she ate her tea. Daddy and I rushed out to see if she was all right but it turned out to be wheezy laughter.
The robin, it seems, had landed in front of Syco. She went all on the alert, ready to disembowel. But then it bob-bobbed very fast over to play with her and before she could do anything it had landed again - on her nose.
Apparently she went a bit, well, syco. But the thing was that being on her nose it was out of reach for any of her usual tactics - biting, clawing and especially kicking unless she wanted to concuss herself with her own back paws. So it got to fly off again unscathed, and Syco had a very embarassed tear around the garden to make herself feel better and settled back down to eating grass again.
Daddy and Amber are very impressed with the Robin Redbreast, though Daddy reckons she will be ready for it next time and all we will find will be a few little red feathers floating forlornly on the wind. But still, what a Brave Birdie he must be.
Wednesday 15 October 2008
Noise Glorious Noise
Today I have created a brand new Day. It is International Speak Only In Shriek Day.
Daddy says I am most definitely over my cold now.
Daddy says I am most definitely over my cold now.
Tuesday 14 October 2008
To Bournemouth And Beyond!
Yep, it was my first trip to the 'Big City' today. I have been to Christchurch many times, to Boscombe, to Southbourne, to Highcliffe, to Yorkshire (the place with all the hills where Mummy comes from), but I've never been to Bournemouth itself until today.
See, Mummy wanted to do a quick Christmas shop for all her family, but also (and much more important) she wanted to open me my very own bank account. I have no idea what this means, but apparently those Guvmont people that Daddy's always swearing at have given me some money to go in a special place until I'm all growed up. So I guess they can't be all bad, right?
Daddy has promised to type that faithfully, though he seems to be wanting a shower now.
Well we got to Bournemouth and straight away I was a bit surprised at how many people seem to live there. There were lots and lots and lots of them, all scurrying about like the ants in our back garden. And almost none of them stopped to coo over me either, its not right!
The first shop we went too had lots of pretty things in it, but smelled really funny. Mummy said that no, it wasn't because she had done a bottyburp, but because they had lots of candles and incense and things like that in there. It was a good place to hang out once I got used to the smell, because all the people that were too busy to coo over me when they were outside wanted to coo over me once they were inside. I felt much better and happier after having my fragile ego massaged for a while.
Next we went to the Early Learning Centre. Wow. Now I know how that boy from the film Aladdin must have felt. It was like someone had got every kind of toy in the whole world and put them all in one place. I wanted to play with everything and did my best octopus impression and grabbed for every toy in sight.
Seeing as the Guvmont had given me all this money I asked Mummy if she wouldn't mind spending it on as many toys as possible instead of putting it away till I grow up, but she said no. Poopy Mummy.
Finally after cruelly taunting me with all the toys and then dashing my hopes of a cot full of so many of them I wouldn't be able to move at night, Mummy took me to the Bank to open my Bank Account. When we were inside we saw a very nice man behind a desk who gave me one of those toys that go all windy and have beads to push along the wires. They go 'clack' a lot which is a funny noise, though Mummy reckons the man got far more fun out of it than I did. I was perfectly happy crinkling and crunching the till receipt she gave me.
I love receipts. They are just the right size for my little fingers, and they feel interesting to touch and make a great noise too.
Once we had opened my account we went home and I fell asleep in the car. When we got back I woke up rather on the hungry side and woke Daddy up yelling for my bottle. He had gone to sleep for an hour while we were out after making sure my sicky sister was all right. I have given her my nasty cold you see, and she was off school coughing and sneezing and generally being a snotbox. Poor sissy.
Once I'd had my bottle I concentrated on taking up where I left off this morning - making as much noise as possible to show my appreciation for feeling all better again. So Daddy has had to translate Yell, Shriek and Red-Faced Strain as well today, I think the poor soul must be feeling a bit harassed. Mummy says not to worry though, he has always been a very cunning linguist.
I was a bit miffed off tonight actually. For a start the phone kept ringing and once Daddy wanted to speak to Ruth and had the audacity to attempt to talk to her on it while holding me. The cheek of it! Well, I wasn't having that, let me tell you. So I squirmed, moaned, yelled and generally writhed about as much as possible because he wasn't paying me enough attention i.e. 100%.
Mummy left Daddy to it a bit and he got miffed off, so when Ruth made a joke about building up his arm muscles by holding me he made another one about arm muscles. I didn't get the joke, but when he said it he did the grin he does when he is annoying Mummy, you know the one I mean?
Sure enough, he tried to use me as a human shield to avoid a ding, does he think he is Saddam Hussein or something? But Mummy took me off him and then he ran and shut himself in the bedroom. He is such a wuss sometimes, I don't know why he makes jokes that annoy Mummy if he is just going to run away afterwards.
Anyway, once he let Mummy in the bedroom and took his punishment, I carried on making it as difficult as possible for him to talk to Ruth on general principles. He apologised for spending most of the conversation talking to me instead of her but she said she finds it very relaxing to hear him talk to me down the phone. That kinda sucked, relaxing was really not what I was going for!
So I was still feeling snippy as it got later on. I couldn't even have my nightly constitutional in the back garden because it started raining hard two minutes after we got outside, and besides I couldn't even see the moon anyway because of all the rainclouds.
Well, after all my mimping I am feeling very sleepy as I dictate this to Daddy, so I will probably fall asleep with my last bottle of the night and go to bed.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
See, Mummy wanted to do a quick Christmas shop for all her family, but also (and much more important) she wanted to open me my very own bank account. I have no idea what this means, but apparently those Guvmont people that Daddy's always swearing at have given me some money to go in a special place until I'm all growed up. So I guess they can't be all bad, right?
Daddy has promised to type that faithfully, though he seems to be wanting a shower now.
Well we got to Bournemouth and straight away I was a bit surprised at how many people seem to live there. There were lots and lots and lots of them, all scurrying about like the ants in our back garden. And almost none of them stopped to coo over me either, its not right!
The first shop we went too had lots of pretty things in it, but smelled really funny. Mummy said that no, it wasn't because she had done a bottyburp, but because they had lots of candles and incense and things like that in there. It was a good place to hang out once I got used to the smell, because all the people that were too busy to coo over me when they were outside wanted to coo over me once they were inside. I felt much better and happier after having my fragile ego massaged for a while.
Next we went to the Early Learning Centre. Wow. Now I know how that boy from the film Aladdin must have felt. It was like someone had got every kind of toy in the whole world and put them all in one place. I wanted to play with everything and did my best octopus impression and grabbed for every toy in sight.
Seeing as the Guvmont had given me all this money I asked Mummy if she wouldn't mind spending it on as many toys as possible instead of putting it away till I grow up, but she said no. Poopy Mummy.
Finally after cruelly taunting me with all the toys and then dashing my hopes of a cot full of so many of them I wouldn't be able to move at night, Mummy took me to the Bank to open my Bank Account. When we were inside we saw a very nice man behind a desk who gave me one of those toys that go all windy and have beads to push along the wires. They go 'clack' a lot which is a funny noise, though Mummy reckons the man got far more fun out of it than I did. I was perfectly happy crinkling and crunching the till receipt she gave me.
I love receipts. They are just the right size for my little fingers, and they feel interesting to touch and make a great noise too.
Once we had opened my account we went home and I fell asleep in the car. When we got back I woke up rather on the hungry side and woke Daddy up yelling for my bottle. He had gone to sleep for an hour while we were out after making sure my sicky sister was all right. I have given her my nasty cold you see, and she was off school coughing and sneezing and generally being a snotbox. Poor sissy.
Once I'd had my bottle I concentrated on taking up where I left off this morning - making as much noise as possible to show my appreciation for feeling all better again. So Daddy has had to translate Yell, Shriek and Red-Faced Strain as well today, I think the poor soul must be feeling a bit harassed. Mummy says not to worry though, he has always been a very cunning linguist.
I was a bit miffed off tonight actually. For a start the phone kept ringing and once Daddy wanted to speak to Ruth and had the audacity to attempt to talk to her on it while holding me. The cheek of it! Well, I wasn't having that, let me tell you. So I squirmed, moaned, yelled and generally writhed about as much as possible because he wasn't paying me enough attention i.e. 100%.
Mummy left Daddy to it a bit and he got miffed off, so when Ruth made a joke about building up his arm muscles by holding me he made another one about arm muscles. I didn't get the joke, but when he said it he did the grin he does when he is annoying Mummy, you know the one I mean?
Sure enough, he tried to use me as a human shield to avoid a ding, does he think he is Saddam Hussein or something? But Mummy took me off him and then he ran and shut himself in the bedroom. He is such a wuss sometimes, I don't know why he makes jokes that annoy Mummy if he is just going to run away afterwards.
Anyway, once he let Mummy in the bedroom and took his punishment, I carried on making it as difficult as possible for him to talk to Ruth on general principles. He apologised for spending most of the conversation talking to me instead of her but she said she finds it very relaxing to hear him talk to me down the phone. That kinda sucked, relaxing was really not what I was going for!
So I was still feeling snippy as it got later on. I couldn't even have my nightly constitutional in the back garden because it started raining hard two minutes after we got outside, and besides I couldn't even see the moon anyway because of all the rainclouds.
Well, after all my mimping I am feeling very sleepy as I dictate this to Daddy, so I will probably fall asleep with my last bottle of the night and go to bed.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Monday 13 October 2008
I Was Ill But I'm Feeling Much Better Noooooooooowwwwwwwwww...
Seriously full moon tonight when Daddy and I went for our nightly jaunt in the back garden. No other garden gets moons like this one, I am so lucky!
I don't quite follow the post title though, I think it's Daddy's little joke.
In other news, my sicky-then-not-sicky-anymore sister has caught my icky cold so is therefore sicky again. She is not having a good time of it right now, bless her.
I'm feeling much better though. Mummy will put me to bed in my cot without the bouncer to prop me up tonight as my little nosey has mostly cleared over the course of last night and today.
Mummy and Daddy took me shopping in Tesco today. Much cooing was had, and we kept bumping into other Mummies that Mummy and Daddy know. One lady that Daddy knew from when he was studying to look after other little kiddywids like me didn't know that Mummy even had a baby in her tummy because he hadn't seen her for ages, and she was really pleased to meet me because I rock, so there!
I rode in the trolley seat in Tesco, it is really good fun. I got a big bottle of juice to chew on and noshed the cap for ages before giving it up as a bad job. Nowhere near as nutritious as milk or Daddy's hand (which I love trying to chew on when sits me on his lap to burp me) but I still howled when Mummy took it off me to give to the lady on the checkout.
I had another mega-kip on Mummy today. I had a feed just before 3 and then Daddy got me to sleep and then handed me over to Mummy so I could try and break yesterday's record nap. I think I did it, too. I've just got oodles and oodles of sleep to catch up on so I'm trying as hard as I can to sleep.
Anyway, Daddy said this would only be a quick post because he is very tired, so night night and sleep tight everyone.
Still A Snotbox
Daddy promised he would write this when he got up to help my big sister be ready for school tomorrow, but he had too many jobs to do last night while Mummy was over at Aunty Chelle's to post then, plus I wasn't exactly cooperative about going to sleep. Because I'm not feeling all that well and am still full of cold, I didn't want my last bottle and didn't want to go to sleep at all.
See I haven't been in my cot the last two nights due to all the snottiness. Well, I have, but actually Daddy came up with the idea of making sure I was propped up by having me sleep in my bouncer in my cot so Mummy could still reach over and cuddle me if I woke up but I wouldn't be as horribly snotty and sleepless as I was laid down flat.
I've still had...better nights though. Daddy spent the day trying to get me to catch up as much sleep as possible, leaning down and patting me back to sleep every time I stirred and cuddling me whenever that didn't work. In the afternoon I slept for 2 and a half hours, most of it on Mummy, my longest daytime nap ever! In fact Daddy had to tell poor Aunty Chelle that Mummy was going to be late because I was still asleep on her, hehehe.
I couldn't go over to the Bowlplex for my big sister's Birthday Party though, I was really bummed about that. Mummy said everybody had a good time though, and she brought me back a Teddybear, bonus! Amber's friend Frankie came back with us for the afternoon and I gave her lots of smiles. She says I look like her little sister Livvy when she was ickle.
To sum up, I have not been a well bunny. I only got a half hour outside in the back garden with Daddy yesterday, that's how ill I was! Though Syco gave herself a clean right in front of me, that was really fascinating. Probably washing off the blood from the last cat she disembowelled, Daddy reckons.
Anyway, I will get Daddy to tell you all about my day again today and hope things will get back to normal again tonight as I'm sure I feel much better now.
See I haven't been in my cot the last two nights due to all the snottiness. Well, I have, but actually Daddy came up with the idea of making sure I was propped up by having me sleep in my bouncer in my cot so Mummy could still reach over and cuddle me if I woke up but I wouldn't be as horribly snotty and sleepless as I was laid down flat.
I've still had...better nights though. Daddy spent the day trying to get me to catch up as much sleep as possible, leaning down and patting me back to sleep every time I stirred and cuddling me whenever that didn't work. In the afternoon I slept for 2 and a half hours, most of it on Mummy, my longest daytime nap ever! In fact Daddy had to tell poor Aunty Chelle that Mummy was going to be late because I was still asleep on her, hehehe.
I couldn't go over to the Bowlplex for my big sister's Birthday Party though, I was really bummed about that. Mummy said everybody had a good time though, and she brought me back a Teddybear, bonus! Amber's friend Frankie came back with us for the afternoon and I gave her lots of smiles. She says I look like her little sister Livvy when she was ickle.
To sum up, I have not been a well bunny. I only got a half hour outside in the back garden with Daddy yesterday, that's how ill I was! Though Syco gave herself a clean right in front of me, that was really fascinating. Probably washing off the blood from the last cat she disembowelled, Daddy reckons.
Anyway, I will get Daddy to tell you all about my day again today and hope things will get back to normal again tonight as I'm sure I feel much better now.
Saturday 11 October 2008
Snotbox
That's what Daddy calls me, and he should know as him and Mummy have been wiping the lovely stuff off my face all day. And most of last night. So much for Daddy's lie-in.
Daddy is feeling a bit snuffly and off-colour himself, and is worried I may have given my little germfest to him. Which considering it is my big sister's Birthday Party tomorrow morning at the place with the big balls (as Daddy calls it) means there may be trouble ahead. It also means he will only be doing a short post tonight, so enjoy it while it lasts.
In other news, I have managed to have loads of playtime with my big sister today for the first time all week due to her sickyness. It's been great fun, we even ballroom danced once and Daddy made that 'Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww' noise when we did it.
I wore my new black T-shirt today, I am teh Goth. Yes, granted the huge pink coat over the top when we went to the harbour this evening kind of destroyed the effect, but what the hell. I felt Gothy. As well as snotty.
I also set a new record for sheer splashiness at bathtime tonight. I rock.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Daddy is feeling a bit snuffly and off-colour himself, and is worried I may have given my little germfest to him. Which considering it is my big sister's Birthday Party tomorrow morning at the place with the big balls (as Daddy calls it) means there may be trouble ahead. It also means he will only be doing a short post tonight, so enjoy it while it lasts.
In other news, I have managed to have loads of playtime with my big sister today for the first time all week due to her sickyness. It's been great fun, we even ballroom danced once and Daddy made that 'Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww' noise when we did it.
I wore my new black T-shirt today, I am teh Goth. Yes, granted the huge pink coat over the top when we went to the harbour this evening kind of destroyed the effect, but what the hell. I felt Gothy. As well as snotty.
I also set a new record for sheer splashiness at bathtime tonight. I rock.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Friday 10 October 2008
Fighting Back Against The System. Man.
Yep, that's what I've been doing today. Asserting my Baby Rights against the Matriarchal/Patriarchal Hierarchy. Right on!
See I'm supposed to have a daytime sleep for at least an hour or so as well as my little naps or I get really cranky by the evening. That's what Mummy and Daddy aka the Parental Oppressors say. But would I succumb to the demands of the System today? No, I wouldn't!
What's brought all this on? Weeeell, I got my first ever black T-Shirt today. As I am a proper Gothy rebel now I have the clothing to prove it, I thought I'd better get with the struggle. Or Something.
Apart from the general snippiness caused by my lack of a proper kip, and my poopy teeth still giving me serious issues I had another fun day, actually. I stayed with Daddy while Mummy took Amber and her schoolfriend Frankie to the swimming pool they go to on a Friday morning and then Mummy went swimming with her other friend at a different pool, just to be confusing. Once I had my 10 o'clock feed Daddy took me into Christchurch in the Tank (well that's what Daddy calls my Buggy/Car Seat combo anyway). Apparently when Grandad was in the Army he drove Tanks, which means he was a bit of a funny soldier to be pushing baby buggies about the place. When he learns to speak Gurgle I shall ask him about it.
When we got to Christchurch we went to the Library. That's a place where you have to be really quiet and not make any noise, Daddy says, so I decided to be good and hardly made a sound the whole time we were in there. Daddy was so pleased with me that he took me to see one of my top Cooing friends, the lady who runs the Chilly Wizard shop.
She is a very nice lady, who always spends ages talking to me in between customers. The Chilly Wizard is one of Daddy's favourite food places as it sells special Sorbets that he can eat because they have no Dairy in them to hurt his tummy, and also they sell Ice Cream for Diabetic people (who must be from Diabia or somewhere else exotic) as well as regular ice cream.
They make the best Ice Cream in Dorset Daddy says. When they say they are offering Strawberry flavour, they really mean made with fresh strawberries, right there in the store. Sometimes you can watch them making it if you are there at the right time, and whenever the Lady is trying out new flavours she always offers some to Mummy, Daddy and Amber so they can try them out and tell her what they think.
Daddy's friends always come in pairs. Yesterday we walked out of the Sports Shop from seeing one friend and then saw another, and today as soon as we left the Chilly Wizard we saw another friend of Daddy's. Daddy hadn't seen her since I was born as apparently she works very long hours and he hardly ever bumps into her anymore.
She gave me very big smiles and Cooed over me lots and lots, and I gave her great big smiles back again too. I think she is very nice and I hope we will bump into her again soon so I can have more Cooing. She thought me having my own Blog was a very funny idea and said she would come and read all about the rest of my day. So if she does come and see what I've been up to, then hello and big hugs to her :)
We popped into the jewellers for yet more Cooing (I have so many fans) and then Daddy walked me back home again to see Mummy. Mummy gave me my next feed and then we went shopping for more clothes for me in Boscombe. This was when I got the black T-shirt I mentioned above, and felt like a proper Goth Baby. I also got a new sleepsuit, two more tops and a really cute pair of jeans. Bonus!
It was all go though, and Mummy had to go and pick my sister up from school and then came back to collect me and took us both over to Granny and Grandad's house so Daddy could get on with some jobs he had to do. I let Granny hold me for a whole five minutes without screaming the place down, wasn't I good? Course I screamed the place down the second she'd used up her five minute goodwill quota, but that's not the point.
Once I came home with Mummy (Amber stays over at Granny's on a Friday night normally) I finally succumbed to tiredness during my feed and fell asleep for a while. But when I did wake up, my was I a cranky little soul. Daddy had to wrap me up in my lovely yellow Blanky and take me out to the back garden. It was very dark outside, but the clouds were only thin and weedy so I could see the gorgeous moon again. It was very bright tonight and I stared at it for ages, couldn't take my eyes off it in fact. In fact it was so relaxing that I dozed off again, right there in Daddy's arms!
When I woke up I still wasn't a happy camper because I just hadn't had enough sleep, and I was virtually ready for my last feed before bedtime, too. I was so wrecked that I went to sleep in my cot while Mummy and Daddy sorted out loads of washing on the bed next to me.
Mummy and Daddy are very tired so I may give them a lie-in tomorrow. I'm thinking that giving into the demands of the System may earn me more cuddles, now I come to think of it...
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
See I'm supposed to have a daytime sleep for at least an hour or so as well as my little naps or I get really cranky by the evening. That's what Mummy and Daddy aka the Parental Oppressors say. But would I succumb to the demands of the System today? No, I wouldn't!
What's brought all this on? Weeeell, I got my first ever black T-Shirt today. As I am a proper Gothy rebel now I have the clothing to prove it, I thought I'd better get with the struggle. Or Something.
Apart from the general snippiness caused by my lack of a proper kip, and my poopy teeth still giving me serious issues I had another fun day, actually. I stayed with Daddy while Mummy took Amber and her schoolfriend Frankie to the swimming pool they go to on a Friday morning and then Mummy went swimming with her other friend at a different pool, just to be confusing. Once I had my 10 o'clock feed Daddy took me into Christchurch in the Tank (well that's what Daddy calls my Buggy/Car Seat combo anyway). Apparently when Grandad was in the Army he drove Tanks, which means he was a bit of a funny soldier to be pushing baby buggies about the place. When he learns to speak Gurgle I shall ask him about it.
When we got to Christchurch we went to the Library. That's a place where you have to be really quiet and not make any noise, Daddy says, so I decided to be good and hardly made a sound the whole time we were in there. Daddy was so pleased with me that he took me to see one of my top Cooing friends, the lady who runs the Chilly Wizard shop.
She is a very nice lady, who always spends ages talking to me in between customers. The Chilly Wizard is one of Daddy's favourite food places as it sells special Sorbets that he can eat because they have no Dairy in them to hurt his tummy, and also they sell Ice Cream for Diabetic people (who must be from Diabia or somewhere else exotic) as well as regular ice cream.
They make the best Ice Cream in Dorset Daddy says. When they say they are offering Strawberry flavour, they really mean made with fresh strawberries, right there in the store. Sometimes you can watch them making it if you are there at the right time, and whenever the Lady is trying out new flavours she always offers some to Mummy, Daddy and Amber so they can try them out and tell her what they think.
Daddy's friends always come in pairs. Yesterday we walked out of the Sports Shop from seeing one friend and then saw another, and today as soon as we left the Chilly Wizard we saw another friend of Daddy's. Daddy hadn't seen her since I was born as apparently she works very long hours and he hardly ever bumps into her anymore.
She gave me very big smiles and Cooed over me lots and lots, and I gave her great big smiles back again too. I think she is very nice and I hope we will bump into her again soon so I can have more Cooing. She thought me having my own Blog was a very funny idea and said she would come and read all about the rest of my day. So if she does come and see what I've been up to, then hello and big hugs to her :)
We popped into the jewellers for yet more Cooing (I have so many fans) and then Daddy walked me back home again to see Mummy. Mummy gave me my next feed and then we went shopping for more clothes for me in Boscombe. This was when I got the black T-shirt I mentioned above, and felt like a proper Goth Baby. I also got a new sleepsuit, two more tops and a really cute pair of jeans. Bonus!
It was all go though, and Mummy had to go and pick my sister up from school and then came back to collect me and took us both over to Granny and Grandad's house so Daddy could get on with some jobs he had to do. I let Granny hold me for a whole five minutes without screaming the place down, wasn't I good? Course I screamed the place down the second she'd used up her five minute goodwill quota, but that's not the point.
Once I came home with Mummy (Amber stays over at Granny's on a Friday night normally) I finally succumbed to tiredness during my feed and fell asleep for a while. But when I did wake up, my was I a cranky little soul. Daddy had to wrap me up in my lovely yellow Blanky and take me out to the back garden. It was very dark outside, but the clouds were only thin and weedy so I could see the gorgeous moon again. It was very bright tonight and I stared at it for ages, couldn't take my eyes off it in fact. In fact it was so relaxing that I dozed off again, right there in Daddy's arms!
When I woke up I still wasn't a happy camper because I just hadn't had enough sleep, and I was virtually ready for my last feed before bedtime, too. I was so wrecked that I went to sleep in my cot while Mummy and Daddy sorted out loads of washing on the bed next to me.
Mummy and Daddy are very tired so I may give them a lie-in tomorrow. I'm thinking that giving into the demands of the System may earn me more cuddles, now I come to think of it...
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Thursday 9 October 2008
Daddy And The Curse Of The Delayed Dinners
Well, no one can say I didn't have a busy, busy day today. I've been all over the place and it's liable to be even busier tomorrow apparently :)
Because of my sicky sister's tummy still being a bit wobbly, Mummy took her into school in the car this morning to help her keep her strength up after being on a diet of rich tea biccies for two days. Poor Amber, now she is at Big School she has to go and see all her teachers and find out all the oodles of work she has to catch up on. I went with her and Mummy to see her into school and so Daddy could get a bit of extra sleep for once.
Shame Mummy was being incredibly loud on the phone when she came back in with me really. Ah well, c'est la parenthood.
I didn't want my next feed. I'm not sure why, I think maybe I must have thought they'd watered it down like yesterday. I wasn't having any of that nonsense again, no Sir! So I had a bit of an empty tummy when Mummy took me to my First Splash baby swimming group, but I didn't care because they have these really fun toys to play with in the pool. I got to play with the Purple Starfish and the Nemo toy, but then I got my hands on my favourite - the Froggy.
Would I let go of it, even when the session finished and it was time to get out of the pool? Well, I'm sure you all know the answer to that one.
When we came back from Swimming I was in a much better mood, and I noshed my feed just fine this time. However just as Daddy took advantage of Mummy giving me my milkies and sat down to enjoy his scrambled eggies on toast, I detonated a Size Eight in my nappy. And the word 'detonate' is accurate too as it exploded out of the top of my nappy, went almost up to my shoulders inside my T-Shirt and got all over Mummy's top and trousers.
See now I thought Daddy would be really pleased that I got Mummy so brilliantly, but it turns out that grownups don't like having to deal with poo when they are about to eat. I don't know why that is, but he didn't seem very happy about having to help change me. He said something about it being just as well he doesn't like Brown Sauce too, I think that's a joke.
After the huge Changing of the Nappy and the Eating of the Cold Scrambled Eggies, we went to Christchurch so Mummy could buy a new hockey stick, and we saw a nice lady in the sports shop who was my big sister's dinner lady once upon a time. She didn't realise that Mummy and Daddy were connected and was very pleased that I was Daddy's baby, and asked lots of questions about me and how Amber was doing at Big School.
Then Daddy walked me down to Christchurch Quay in the buggy while Mummy took the car, but we literally only got three metres before he saw his friend Denise, who hadn't met me yet and wanted to have a good coo. I like cooing, it always makes me smile so wide my dummy falls out.
When we got to the Quay, the seagulls were out in force. Within the first few seconds of Mummy starting to throw bread in the air, we had dozens and dozens swarming us. They made so much noise even the ducks seemed a bit worried, and there were so many buzzing us that Daddy got a wing buffet on his head, and had to step back very quickly with me when two of them had a mid-air collision and one nearly landed on me.
I just wasn't quick enough to grab him and bring him home though. Poo.
When we got back from Christchurch, Mummy went off to pick Amber up from school, and I suddenly realised I hadn't had a sleep all day. So Daddy cuddled me off and I went in my bouncer until Mummy and Amber came home, and she snuggled me on the sofa and we had our afternoon nap together. When I woke up I felt much better and I had lots of cuddles with Mummy and Daddy while Amber did her catching-up homework. Unfortunately Amber then had a little moment when she went to get a towel for her shower...
It seems that earlier on Mummy banged into a picture frame that was on a dresser table in Mummy and Daddy's room and moved it out of the way onto the bed. Then Daddy took a load of washing upstairs and put it on the bed without knowing the picture was there underneath. And when Amber clambered onto the bed to reach the airing cupboard there was the proverbial cracking sound, and that was the end of the picture frame.
Problem was of course that now there was lots of little bits of glass on some of the washing and on the duvet cover - this is officially Not Good. Funny thing was this happened just as Daddy's meatballs and pasta that Mummy had kindly cooked him was ready, so he had to wait for his food again!
One day Daddy will get to sit and eat his meals when they're actually ready. It will almost certainly be a Tuesday.
Later on, I felt a bit hard done by when Mummy went to see her friend Dan at the pub after Amber went to bed, so I had a bit of a mimp at Daddy and he took me out into the back garden to chill me out.And joy, the moon was out and the clouds couldn't cover it. I spent ages staring at it once Daddy pointed it out to me. There were lots of lovely stars as well and we stayed out there for quite a long time. I was so relaxed that I had another little nap before my last feed.
Mummy came back from the pub just in time to put me to bed, bonus! Daddy got me in my baby sleeping bag thingy and then Mummy stayed with me through the inevitable Footslamming and Dummygobbing. Daddy says that if I was a Dwarf baby I'd be from the Footslammer Clan as I like to do it so much.
Well that's about it for another busy, busy day. Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Because of my sicky sister's tummy still being a bit wobbly, Mummy took her into school in the car this morning to help her keep her strength up after being on a diet of rich tea biccies for two days. Poor Amber, now she is at Big School she has to go and see all her teachers and find out all the oodles of work she has to catch up on. I went with her and Mummy to see her into school and so Daddy could get a bit of extra sleep for once.
Shame Mummy was being incredibly loud on the phone when she came back in with me really. Ah well, c'est la parenthood.
I didn't want my next feed. I'm not sure why, I think maybe I must have thought they'd watered it down like yesterday. I wasn't having any of that nonsense again, no Sir! So I had a bit of an empty tummy when Mummy took me to my First Splash baby swimming group, but I didn't care because they have these really fun toys to play with in the pool. I got to play with the Purple Starfish and the Nemo toy, but then I got my hands on my favourite - the Froggy.
Would I let go of it, even when the session finished and it was time to get out of the pool? Well, I'm sure you all know the answer to that one.
When we came back from Swimming I was in a much better mood, and I noshed my feed just fine this time. However just as Daddy took advantage of Mummy giving me my milkies and sat down to enjoy his scrambled eggies on toast, I detonated a Size Eight in my nappy. And the word 'detonate' is accurate too as it exploded out of the top of my nappy, went almost up to my shoulders inside my T-Shirt and got all over Mummy's top and trousers.
See now I thought Daddy would be really pleased that I got Mummy so brilliantly, but it turns out that grownups don't like having to deal with poo when they are about to eat. I don't know why that is, but he didn't seem very happy about having to help change me. He said something about it being just as well he doesn't like Brown Sauce too, I think that's a joke.
After the huge Changing of the Nappy and the Eating of the Cold Scrambled Eggies, we went to Christchurch so Mummy could buy a new hockey stick, and we saw a nice lady in the sports shop who was my big sister's dinner lady once upon a time. She didn't realise that Mummy and Daddy were connected and was very pleased that I was Daddy's baby, and asked lots of questions about me and how Amber was doing at Big School.
Then Daddy walked me down to Christchurch Quay in the buggy while Mummy took the car, but we literally only got three metres before he saw his friend Denise, who hadn't met me yet and wanted to have a good coo. I like cooing, it always makes me smile so wide my dummy falls out.
When we got to the Quay, the seagulls were out in force. Within the first few seconds of Mummy starting to throw bread in the air, we had dozens and dozens swarming us. They made so much noise even the ducks seemed a bit worried, and there were so many buzzing us that Daddy got a wing buffet on his head, and had to step back very quickly with me when two of them had a mid-air collision and one nearly landed on me.
I just wasn't quick enough to grab him and bring him home though. Poo.
When we got back from Christchurch, Mummy went off to pick Amber up from school, and I suddenly realised I hadn't had a sleep all day. So Daddy cuddled me off and I went in my bouncer until Mummy and Amber came home, and she snuggled me on the sofa and we had our afternoon nap together. When I woke up I felt much better and I had lots of cuddles with Mummy and Daddy while Amber did her catching-up homework. Unfortunately Amber then had a little moment when she went to get a towel for her shower...
It seems that earlier on Mummy banged into a picture frame that was on a dresser table in Mummy and Daddy's room and moved it out of the way onto the bed. Then Daddy took a load of washing upstairs and put it on the bed without knowing the picture was there underneath. And when Amber clambered onto the bed to reach the airing cupboard there was the proverbial cracking sound, and that was the end of the picture frame.
Problem was of course that now there was lots of little bits of glass on some of the washing and on the duvet cover - this is officially Not Good. Funny thing was this happened just as Daddy's meatballs and pasta that Mummy had kindly cooked him was ready, so he had to wait for his food again!
One day Daddy will get to sit and eat his meals when they're actually ready. It will almost certainly be a Tuesday.
Later on, I felt a bit hard done by when Mummy went to see her friend Dan at the pub after Amber went to bed, so I had a bit of a mimp at Daddy and he took me out into the back garden to chill me out.And joy, the moon was out and the clouds couldn't cover it. I spent ages staring at it once Daddy pointed it out to me. There were lots of lovely stars as well and we stayed out there for quite a long time. I was so relaxed that I had another little nap before my last feed.
Mummy came back from the pub just in time to put me to bed, bonus! Daddy got me in my baby sleeping bag thingy and then Mummy stayed with me through the inevitable Footslamming and Dummygobbing. Daddy says that if I was a Dwarf baby I'd be from the Footslammer Clan as I like to do it so much.
Well that's about it for another busy, busy day. Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Wednesday 8 October 2008
Aunty Chelle
Auntie Chelle isn't really my auntie, but she is our fun friend. She is always very happy to see me and always gives me lots of cuddles and playtime. I spent ages with her today when Mummy picked her up to come and visit us all. We went to Sainsbury's for that 'bredunmiwk' stuff we always seem to go there for, and then we came home to see Daddy and my sicky sister, who isn't as sicky as she was and is going back to school tomorrow if she isn't sicky again. This is officially Good News as she might have had to miss her birthday party on sunday if she didn't get better.
When we got back home Daddy gave me lots of cuddles and he snuggled me while I had my bottle. I have been having cartons today as my tummy has been a bit funny too and cartons are better for me than powdered milk. Mummy and Daddy were silly enough to try and water my milk down this morning to help my tummy - I wasn't having any of that nonsense and I made it very very clear too. In Shriek.
Once I had finished my bottle I did a big window-rattling burp and went to sleep for a little while. When I woke up I had some Tummy Time on my Eeyore blanky and Aunty Chelle took this lovely picture of me.
Daddy says modesty is a virtue of people who have nothing to boast about so I'm going to shamelessly blow my own trumpet and say how totally cute I look, so there! Aunty Chelle was so pleased with herself for getting me at just the right moment, she was grinning like a Cheshire Cat. Even Amber stirred from her pit of Unclean Sicky Doom and said how nice it looked.
Aunty Chelle stayed for dinner and I grinned at her and flailed about on Mummy's lap. Mummy managed to eat her tea while I did it as well, I was very impressed.
After tea I went back to Aunty Chelle's and played with Kizzy the little yappy dog. I like to try and stroke her fur but Mummy doesn't let me because doggies aren't very clean creatures. Daddy says the caretaker's great big woofy dog at his old school wasn't very clean at all, in fact it used to go up to the gate and 'put on a show', whatever that means. Maybe it did poetry recitals or some light opera?
We were just getting ready to go to Mudeford Quay when Mummy suddenly remembered she was meant to go to Hockey Practice tonight, so we had to rush back home, hand me over to Daddy and then off she went, and came back without any new artificial joints or breaks of any sort, bonus!
Daddy says This Won't Last.
I was very good for Daddy, I snuggled into him and we watched a show with a spaceship in it, it was really cool. I even gave him a lovely goopy yellow poo to change, he seemed very pleased with it. He always takes the poopy nappies out to the kitchen when he's done with them, I think he must be making a collection out there somewhere.
I didn't want to go to sleep after my last feed though. I did all my favourite tricks - the Footslamming to kick my covers off, the Gobbing of the Dummy, and then just as Daddy went back downstairs I heard Mummy come in so I asked her very politely if she wouldn't mind coming upstairs to see me, just for a few brief moments. In Yell.
She did, yay for my powers of persuasion eh? But now I'm very tired and I am going to get my beauty sleep so Aunty Chelle can come and take more super-cute pics of me tomorrow.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
When we got back home Daddy gave me lots of cuddles and he snuggled me while I had my bottle. I have been having cartons today as my tummy has been a bit funny too and cartons are better for me than powdered milk. Mummy and Daddy were silly enough to try and water my milk down this morning to help my tummy - I wasn't having any of that nonsense and I made it very very clear too. In Shriek.
Once I had finished my bottle I did a big window-rattling burp and went to sleep for a little while. When I woke up I had some Tummy Time on my Eeyore blanky and Aunty Chelle took this lovely picture of me.
Daddy says modesty is a virtue of people who have nothing to boast about so I'm going to shamelessly blow my own trumpet and say how totally cute I look, so there! Aunty Chelle was so pleased with herself for getting me at just the right moment, she was grinning like a Cheshire Cat. Even Amber stirred from her pit of Unclean Sicky Doom and said how nice it looked.Aunty Chelle stayed for dinner and I grinned at her and flailed about on Mummy's lap. Mummy managed to eat her tea while I did it as well, I was very impressed.
After tea I went back to Aunty Chelle's and played with Kizzy the little yappy dog. I like to try and stroke her fur but Mummy doesn't let me because doggies aren't very clean creatures. Daddy says the caretaker's great big woofy dog at his old school wasn't very clean at all, in fact it used to go up to the gate and 'put on a show', whatever that means. Maybe it did poetry recitals or some light opera?
We were just getting ready to go to Mudeford Quay when Mummy suddenly remembered she was meant to go to Hockey Practice tonight, so we had to rush back home, hand me over to Daddy and then off she went, and came back without any new artificial joints or breaks of any sort, bonus!
Daddy says This Won't Last.
I was very good for Daddy, I snuggled into him and we watched a show with a spaceship in it, it was really cool. I even gave him a lovely goopy yellow poo to change, he seemed very pleased with it. He always takes the poopy nappies out to the kitchen when he's done with them, I think he must be making a collection out there somewhere.
I didn't want to go to sleep after my last feed though. I did all my favourite tricks - the Footslamming to kick my covers off, the Gobbing of the Dummy, and then just as Daddy went back downstairs I heard Mummy come in so I asked her very politely if she wouldn't mind coming upstairs to see me, just for a few brief moments. In Yell.
She did, yay for my powers of persuasion eh? But now I'm very tired and I am going to get my beauty sleep so Aunty Chelle can come and take more super-cute pics of me tomorrow.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Our Bunny: Still An Idiot
Syco kept jumping over the sawdust bale into the kitchen tonight and Daddy had to help me chase her out again three times. Then when the tumbledrier finished he shut the door and was very relieved that she couldn't do it again.
Then about a minute later there was the sound of bunny meeting glass. She is just that stubborn, and also it seems rather unobservant. What a dimlo bunny she is.
Then about a minute later there was the sound of bunny meeting glass. She is just that stubborn, and also it seems rather unobservant. What a dimlo bunny she is.
Tuesday 7 October 2008
I'm Not Well But At Least My Aim Is Improving
I got Daddy today, right up the arm, just as he was putting my new nappy on. It splashed all the way up to his elbow, bonus!
But I'm not a well bunny. Mummy and Daddy think Amber has given me her nasty bug, which the doctor says is an upper digestive bug. I knew Daddy shouldn't have had those choccy biscuits.
Whatever is up with me, I haven't felt very hungry for the last two days and have been right off my feeds. In fact I've found much more interesting things to do when Daddy is trying to feed me, like Mummy. Wherever she is in the room. But Daddy is very interesting too, specially when Mummy is feeding me.
This week I am learning what bibs are for.
Daddy took me out into the garden tonight when I got a bit snippy and I got to see a perfect half-moon. It was amazing, I stared at it for ages as the clouds scudded across it. Daddy sung to me in my Blanky and then Amber came out to get a bit of fresh air after she had a sicky moment. Then she went back in and Mummy came out and quickly cleaned Syco's hutch before it got totally dark, so I got to spend time with all the family in my wonderful garden tonight, yay me!
I went to the baby group today but another Mummy upset my Mummy by making nasty remarks, and even made one about dummies. I love my dummy, and its a load of stinky poo to say bad things about mummies who let their babies have dummies. For starters, I bet her baby didn't start teething at nine weeks!
Also I got very miffed when Mummy went to the loo, and screamed and screamed and screamed. About six Mummies and the health visitor all cooed over me and tried to distract me so I will have to do this more often I think, all the attention was really cool actually.
Then a Big Boy (who must have been at least three) fell over and banged his head and went to sleep straight away. Everyone was very worried and he had to go to the hospital where babies sometimes come from, that has Daddy's old Nursery next to it. I could wave at him from the balcony when Mummy took me outside and he was playing in the garden with the Nursery children when I was first born, it was great.
Mummy didn't panic when the boy banged his head. It helped that his Mummy was a nurse too, but my Mummy is so cool that she has done all kinds of things to help sick people who just keel over in front of her. I was there a few months ago when she helped a man having a heart attack in Boscombe, she was so calm and collected that I didn't even kick off and yell once the whole time. She even delivered a baby in the medical room at the Littledown Centre when she was a Lifeguard, and the lady was so grateful she named her new baby girl Amiee after my Mummy!
I slept in a bit this morning, and Mummy and Daddy have asked me nicely if I wouldn't mind doing the same again tomorrow so Daddy can ring up and yell at the people who are meant to look after our house about our stupid bathroom fan. It keeps making horrible rattly noises and this is the fifth time Daddy has had to get them to fix it. I think if they don't disconnect it like he asks them to he will probably beat the engineer to death with his own toolkit. I'm definitely going to watch, because I'm as miffed off as Daddy about the poopy thing always working itself loose again about two minutes after the man fixes it.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
But I'm not a well bunny. Mummy and Daddy think Amber has given me her nasty bug, which the doctor says is an upper digestive bug. I knew Daddy shouldn't have had those choccy biscuits.
Whatever is up with me, I haven't felt very hungry for the last two days and have been right off my feeds. In fact I've found much more interesting things to do when Daddy is trying to feed me, like Mummy. Wherever she is in the room. But Daddy is very interesting too, specially when Mummy is feeding me.
This week I am learning what bibs are for.
Daddy took me out into the garden tonight when I got a bit snippy and I got to see a perfect half-moon. It was amazing, I stared at it for ages as the clouds scudded across it. Daddy sung to me in my Blanky and then Amber came out to get a bit of fresh air after she had a sicky moment. Then she went back in and Mummy came out and quickly cleaned Syco's hutch before it got totally dark, so I got to spend time with all the family in my wonderful garden tonight, yay me!
I went to the baby group today but another Mummy upset my Mummy by making nasty remarks, and even made one about dummies. I love my dummy, and its a load of stinky poo to say bad things about mummies who let their babies have dummies. For starters, I bet her baby didn't start teething at nine weeks!
Also I got very miffed when Mummy went to the loo, and screamed and screamed and screamed. About six Mummies and the health visitor all cooed over me and tried to distract me so I will have to do this more often I think, all the attention was really cool actually.
Then a Big Boy (who must have been at least three) fell over and banged his head and went to sleep straight away. Everyone was very worried and he had to go to the hospital where babies sometimes come from, that has Daddy's old Nursery next to it. I could wave at him from the balcony when Mummy took me outside and he was playing in the garden with the Nursery children when I was first born, it was great.
Mummy didn't panic when the boy banged his head. It helped that his Mummy was a nurse too, but my Mummy is so cool that she has done all kinds of things to help sick people who just keel over in front of her. I was there a few months ago when she helped a man having a heart attack in Boscombe, she was so calm and collected that I didn't even kick off and yell once the whole time. She even delivered a baby in the medical room at the Littledown Centre when she was a Lifeguard, and the lady was so grateful she named her new baby girl Amiee after my Mummy!
I slept in a bit this morning, and Mummy and Daddy have asked me nicely if I wouldn't mind doing the same again tomorrow so Daddy can ring up and yell at the people who are meant to look after our house about our stupid bathroom fan. It keeps making horrible rattly noises and this is the fifth time Daddy has had to get them to fix it. I think if they don't disconnect it like he asks them to he will probably beat the engineer to death with his own toolkit. I'm definitely going to watch, because I'm as miffed off as Daddy about the poopy thing always working itself loose again about two minutes after the man fixes it.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Monday 6 October 2008
The Moon Lay Hidden Beneath A Cloud...
...is a pair of funny people that Daddy likes listening to, but its also what happened when he took me outside in the back garden tonight when I was getting snippy. We waited for the moon to come out from behind a house in the next road, but as soon as it did Daddy had just enough time to point it out to me before a nasty black cloud drifted over and covered it and then wouldn't let it come out to play. Poopy cloud. I was really looking forward to seeing it nice and bright as well.
In other news, Daddy fixed the puter tonight while Mummy was giving me my last feed. Now Mummy and Daddy won't be fighting over who gets to go on the laptop, yay!
This is my second night in the baby sleeping bag, hopefully I will sleep better than last night. I was a bit of a sod apparently, though when Mummy fell asleep this morning thirty seconds after promising Daddy she would give me my first feed I was Stealth Baby again, yay me! Mummy managed to sleep in till 10 because I was such a quiet girl. Daddy helped a bit too, so as a reward I gave him a lovely big yellow poo to change. Aren't I generous?
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
In other news, Daddy fixed the puter tonight while Mummy was giving me my last feed. Now Mummy and Daddy won't be fighting over who gets to go on the laptop, yay!
This is my second night in the baby sleeping bag, hopefully I will sleep better than last night. I was a bit of a sod apparently, though when Mummy fell asleep this morning thirty seconds after promising Daddy she would give me my first feed I was Stealth Baby again, yay me! Mummy managed to sleep in till 10 because I was such a quiet girl. Daddy helped a bit too, so as a reward I gave him a lovely big yellow poo to change. Aren't I generous?
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Sicky Sister
My poor sister isn't very well. Her tummy has started hurting again and she has been sick at school, so Mummy had to jump in the car to go and get her just as Daddy was starting his lunch.
I am afraid he didn't enjoy his scrambled eggies on toast very much as I was not in the mood to chill out in my bouncer. Or on my Eeyore blanky with my toys. Or pretty much anywhere but in Daddy's arms being cuddled, in point of fact. Oopsy.
I am officially not allowed to play with my big sister until at least tomorrow night now. This is very annoying, and I have been making my displeasure about the situation very clear, in fluent Yell.
I am afraid he didn't enjoy his scrambled eggies on toast very much as I was not in the mood to chill out in my bouncer. Or on my Eeyore blanky with my toys. Or pretty much anywhere but in Daddy's arms being cuddled, in point of fact. Oopsy.
I am officially not allowed to play with my big sister until at least tomorrow night now. This is very annoying, and I have been making my displeasure about the situation very clear, in fluent Yell.
Our Bunny Is An Idiot
Syco thinks she is so strong and tough that she can jump back in her hutch even when Daddy has closed the door. This is Not True. But it is very amusing to watch, especially when she lopes off as if nothing has happened and it was some other bunny that just made a total pillock of herself.
Sunday 5 October 2008
Attack Of The Killer Swans (With Extra Really Big Waves)
Mummy is scared of swans! I never knew this until this afternoon. We went to Mudeford Quay when the rain stopped and the sun poked out a tiny bit, but when we got there the winds were high and the tide was very high, so when we went to the harbour path the water was lapping over the edges.
Daddy turned away to look at a birdie and when he looked back he saw there was a swan right behind Mummy and me. Mummy shrieked and jumped away, and suddenly it seemed like every swan in the world could see our bread (and Daddy's Danish pastry) and started to clamber out of the water together. It was awesome!
Mummy didnt think so though. Even when Daddy became the bread-waving Pied Piper of Mudeford and led about a dozen of them away and even hand-fed the really pushy ones, Mummy kept calling his name when one or two stray ones came to play with us because Amber had another loaf of bread. He seemed to be a bit busy protecting his Danish though. He said one swan that wouldn't leave him alone must have a Sweet Beak.
Just when we thought Daddy had managed to take them all over to him, he saw that one swan had been wandering across the green all by itself and was coming up behind us. We think maybe it was the Goth Swan from the other night. Mummy and I had to get away very quickly as we thought it might bite us or make us listen to Marilyn Manson or something.
Once Daddy had managed to get most of the swans back in the water with a trail of bread we went to the main part of the Quay where the sea is. And I saw something I've never seen before - because of the wind and the very high tide the sea was crashing into the sea wall and was washing and crashing right over the edge under the rails and into the car park. People's car tyres were getting wet, and you couldn't walk along some of the main pathway unless you wanted your feet to get really wet.
There are three levels to the sea wall part of the quay, two steps and then a big five foot high wall. There were a few bits where the water was actually splashing up on top of the whole wall! My big sister is so brave, she decided to walk the whole length of the upper step and back again despite the big waves crashing up. Daddy said the sea missed its cue because when she got to the other end and waved at us a huge wave crashed up and would have soaked her all over - about five seconds after she started walking back.
Where the railing meets the sea wall the waves meet something weird called a 'cross-current', Daddy says, so the waves look like they are going to roll right in over the edge but then sort of stop. But today when there was only a small wave going sideways when a really big one rolled in it really did wash all the way over and soak everyone's feet who was within about thirty feet of the edge - Mummy said Amber could play chicken with it because some other children with wellies on were already doing it. And the sea won because she got soaked up to the knees in the first minute, hehehehe.
Daddy said that would happen because Amber usually gets her feet wet when they walk the beach to Granny and Grandad's and they go next to the tide. We always make sure she has an extra pair of socks and trousers just in case.
We are going to buy a tide timetable so we can try and visit the Quay at high tide again when its windy, and also next time Mummy and Daddy promise they will remember their mobile phones so they can get some pictures of the giant waves. Poor lambs, they just aren't up there in the hightech age like I am.
Daddy says that sometimes in the winter when the sea is really stormy they have to close the entire car park and stop the cars getting in because the sea rolls all the way over and floods it out. I'd love to see that.
By the way, tonight I am trying out my new baby sleeping bag for the first time as my little lungs need the window open a bit but this means its getting cold. As I like to be really close and snuggly in my cot this should help me sleep better. Wish Mummy and Daddy luck!
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Daddy turned away to look at a birdie and when he looked back he saw there was a swan right behind Mummy and me. Mummy shrieked and jumped away, and suddenly it seemed like every swan in the world could see our bread (and Daddy's Danish pastry) and started to clamber out of the water together. It was awesome!
Mummy didnt think so though. Even when Daddy became the bread-waving Pied Piper of Mudeford and led about a dozen of them away and even hand-fed the really pushy ones, Mummy kept calling his name when one or two stray ones came to play with us because Amber had another loaf of bread. He seemed to be a bit busy protecting his Danish though. He said one swan that wouldn't leave him alone must have a Sweet Beak.
Just when we thought Daddy had managed to take them all over to him, he saw that one swan had been wandering across the green all by itself and was coming up behind us. We think maybe it was the Goth Swan from the other night. Mummy and I had to get away very quickly as we thought it might bite us or make us listen to Marilyn Manson or something.
Once Daddy had managed to get most of the swans back in the water with a trail of bread we went to the main part of the Quay where the sea is. And I saw something I've never seen before - because of the wind and the very high tide the sea was crashing into the sea wall and was washing and crashing right over the edge under the rails and into the car park. People's car tyres were getting wet, and you couldn't walk along some of the main pathway unless you wanted your feet to get really wet.
There are three levels to the sea wall part of the quay, two steps and then a big five foot high wall. There were a few bits where the water was actually splashing up on top of the whole wall! My big sister is so brave, she decided to walk the whole length of the upper step and back again despite the big waves crashing up. Daddy said the sea missed its cue because when she got to the other end and waved at us a huge wave crashed up and would have soaked her all over - about five seconds after she started walking back.
Where the railing meets the sea wall the waves meet something weird called a 'cross-current', Daddy says, so the waves look like they are going to roll right in over the edge but then sort of stop. But today when there was only a small wave going sideways when a really big one rolled in it really did wash all the way over and soak everyone's feet who was within about thirty feet of the edge - Mummy said Amber could play chicken with it because some other children with wellies on were already doing it. And the sea won because she got soaked up to the knees in the first minute, hehehehe.
Daddy said that would happen because Amber usually gets her feet wet when they walk the beach to Granny and Grandad's and they go next to the tide. We always make sure she has an extra pair of socks and trousers just in case.
We are going to buy a tide timetable so we can try and visit the Quay at high tide again when its windy, and also next time Mummy and Daddy promise they will remember their mobile phones so they can get some pictures of the giant waves. Poor lambs, they just aren't up there in the hightech age like I am.
Daddy says that sometimes in the winter when the sea is really stormy they have to close the entire car park and stop the cars getting in because the sea rolls all the way over and floods it out. I'd love to see that.
By the way, tonight I am trying out my new baby sleeping bag for the first time as my little lungs need the window open a bit but this means its getting cold. As I like to be really close and snuggly in my cot this should help me sleep better. Wish Mummy and Daddy luck!
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Saturday 4 October 2008
Bullseye Baby
My aim is improving, Daddy says. I managed to wee right up Mummy's leg when she was changing me tonight! Aren't I getting good?
In other news, my big sister wasn't very well when she came back from Granny and Grandad's this afternoon. She didn't feel very well in the car and then she was sick in the toilet. But when she was feeling better Daddy took me upstairs to grin at her and help her cheer up.
When she came downstairs Daddy and I made a cross shape out of the DVD and telly remotes and yelled 'Unclean, unclean!' at her which was maybe a bit mean as she doesn't smell very much at all (certainly not as bad as Daddy's bottyburps) and has a shower every night. She said she would come and breathe on him if he didn't stop being naughty so he shut up. She seems all right now though so maybe we can have a good game with my favourite teddybear tomorrow. He is big and brown and is taller than me, but I'm sure I will get taller soon and then I can pick him up and snuggle him.
I want to play with Skullsplitter the Barbarian Baby Bear as well, but I'm sure I heard Daddy say that someone wants to ban him, which is a bit harsh. After all the worst he ever does is to accidentally say rude words on camera during broadcasts of 'Morkahn and Skullsplitter's Animal Experience', and then make a mistake with a throwing axe and hit the camera crew. Oh, and give my big sister hiccups by making her laugh too much.
Daddy says its a shame I have inherited my Amber's tendency to giggle too much and get nasty hiccups. Mummy says she doesn't let Daddy play with my sister at bedtime anymore because he always makes her laugh too much and gives her the hiccups, which means she won't go straight to sleep. Daddy says he has been doing that since she was small and doesn't see why he should stop now just because she is in Big Big Big School and is this super-duper mature girl nowadays.
My sister is really Big and Brave. She is nearly twelve which is really Big and has to get two big buses to school everyday and put up with stupid girls from another school and sometimes she has to drag her great big peebag as well. I'm not too sure what that is, it sounds gross but it can't really be a bag full of weewee can it? I mean why?
My sister lets me lay on her bed sometimes when we play. It is the comfiest bed in the world. Daddy says when he used to play games on it with Amber he would want to go to sleep on it all the time because it is so comfy and soft, and Amber had to make Skullsplitter jump on him to stop him going to sleep, yay the Barbarian Baby Bears! I lie down on it and giggle lots and lots when Amber plays with me in her room.
I was miffed that I couldn't cuddle my sister today because Daddy wasn't sure if she had a Bug. I looked very carefully but I couldn't see any beetles or spiders or anything like that, so I think she will be able to snuggle me and play with me tomorrow.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
In other news, my big sister wasn't very well when she came back from Granny and Grandad's this afternoon. She didn't feel very well in the car and then she was sick in the toilet. But when she was feeling better Daddy took me upstairs to grin at her and help her cheer up.
When she came downstairs Daddy and I made a cross shape out of the DVD and telly remotes and yelled 'Unclean, unclean!' at her which was maybe a bit mean as she doesn't smell very much at all (certainly not as bad as Daddy's bottyburps) and has a shower every night. She said she would come and breathe on him if he didn't stop being naughty so he shut up. She seems all right now though so maybe we can have a good game with my favourite teddybear tomorrow. He is big and brown and is taller than me, but I'm sure I will get taller soon and then I can pick him up and snuggle him.
I want to play with Skullsplitter the Barbarian Baby Bear as well, but I'm sure I heard Daddy say that someone wants to ban him, which is a bit harsh. After all the worst he ever does is to accidentally say rude words on camera during broadcasts of 'Morkahn and Skullsplitter's Animal Experience', and then make a mistake with a throwing axe and hit the camera crew. Oh, and give my big sister hiccups by making her laugh too much.
Daddy says its a shame I have inherited my Amber's tendency to giggle too much and get nasty hiccups. Mummy says she doesn't let Daddy play with my sister at bedtime anymore because he always makes her laugh too much and gives her the hiccups, which means she won't go straight to sleep. Daddy says he has been doing that since she was small and doesn't see why he should stop now just because she is in Big Big Big School and is this super-duper mature girl nowadays.
My sister is really Big and Brave. She is nearly twelve which is really Big and has to get two big buses to school everyday and put up with stupid girls from another school and sometimes she has to drag her great big peebag as well. I'm not too sure what that is, it sounds gross but it can't really be a bag full of weewee can it? I mean why?
My sister lets me lay on her bed sometimes when we play. It is the comfiest bed in the world. Daddy says when he used to play games on it with Amber he would want to go to sleep on it all the time because it is so comfy and soft, and Amber had to make Skullsplitter jump on him to stop him going to sleep, yay the Barbarian Baby Bears! I lie down on it and giggle lots and lots when Amber plays with me in her room.
I was miffed that I couldn't cuddle my sister today because Daddy wasn't sure if she had a Bug. I looked very carefully but I couldn't see any beetles or spiders or anything like that, so I think she will be able to snuggle me and play with me tomorrow.
Night night and sleep tight everyone.
Friday 3 October 2008
Daddy Broke The Puter & Other Stories
Silly daddy. He was cleaning the nasty dust off the vents in the puter and he thinks maybe its his magnetic personality that has stopped a bit of it from working. He is understandably miffed off about this so I've given him four poos and rivers of dribble today to help him feel better.
He has decided that my poos smell like rice pudding that has gone off. As apparently my first solid food is going to be baby rice I'm getting a little nervous about this thought.
Mummy is going to make Daddy watch a chick-flick tonight as punishment for being all annoyed when he broke the puter. I'm not sure what that means but it must be like that film with the piggy in it that we watched yesterday, only with a cute little chick in it.
My big sister went to Marwell Zoo today and brought me back a birdie - a penguin that Daddy wants to call 'Plonker' only Mummy won't let him. Apparently I am supposed to name all my toys myself, so I want to be like Amber and have chainmail teddybears called cool things like Skullsplitter.
In the evening we went to Mudeford Quay again and I went to sleep in my new megacoat. It keeps me toasty warm and Mummy likes it because she can cuddle me afterwards and warm herself up. We saw eighteen swans, but Daddy says one of them was having a Goth day because it swam away from its friends and didn't want to have food fights like the others did.
Daddy says that one year there were proper Black Swans living in the reeds opposite Christchurch Quay. I wonder if they were Goths too?
He has decided that my poos smell like rice pudding that has gone off. As apparently my first solid food is going to be baby rice I'm getting a little nervous about this thought.
Mummy is going to make Daddy watch a chick-flick tonight as punishment for being all annoyed when he broke the puter. I'm not sure what that means but it must be like that film with the piggy in it that we watched yesterday, only with a cute little chick in it.
My big sister went to Marwell Zoo today and brought me back a birdie - a penguin that Daddy wants to call 'Plonker' only Mummy won't let him. Apparently I am supposed to name all my toys myself, so I want to be like Amber and have chainmail teddybears called cool things like Skullsplitter.
In the evening we went to Mudeford Quay again and I went to sleep in my new megacoat. It keeps me toasty warm and Mummy likes it because she can cuddle me afterwards and warm herself up. We saw eighteen swans, but Daddy says one of them was having a Goth day because it swam away from its friends and didn't want to have food fights like the others did.
Daddy says that one year there were proper Black Swans living in the reeds opposite Christchurch Quay. I wonder if they were Goths too?
Wednesday 1 October 2008
Snippy Day
I have officially had a Snippy Day. I've been in one of 'those' moods all day, apparently. Personally I think I've been nothing but sweetness and light all day (well except for mimping all the time, and not having a proper nap out of sheer stubbornness, and being a pain with my feed and getting milk all over Daddy's arm, and pulling handfuls of Daddy's chest hair at the same time then protesting mightily when I get scratch mitts put on me, and also come to think of it managing to cut my own tongue a tiny bit when I pulled my hand out of my mouth thus freaking out Daddy who was pushing me to meet Amber at the Bus Stop at the time).
See? Mummy and Daddy are being dreadfully unfair to use a word like 'snippy'. It's just been a normal day at the office really.
See? Mummy and Daddy are being dreadfully unfair to use a word like 'snippy'. It's just been a normal day at the office really.
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